Friday, September 21, 2018

Wearing a Wig for Religious Purposes is Not Being Slutty


Is there nothing more urgent in the Torah world than how long a married woman’s Shaitel (wig) should be?! And yet with all the serious issues affecting this world, for some people- this is the subject they choose to address in the most serious of tones.

And I am once again dismayed by the most recent harangue on this subject. Apparently wigs that are deemed too long, are considered ‘slutty’.

This is not the first time this issue has surfaced. It has been around for quite some time. And the attitude is always the same.The longer the Shaitel is the sluttier it is.  According to a New York Post article on the subject - even human hair Shaitels are frowned upon. One woman, Esther Adina Sash (who calls herself ‘@Flatbush girl’ - on her Instagram account and regularly posts pictures of herself in long Shaitels) - has been victimized with some truly nasty comments. Such as: 
Go drown yourself in a lake — you’re negatively influencing young girls…  
(Please understand that this post is not about the propriety of using social media in this way. It is about condemning long Shaitels.)

I cannot protest this attitude enough. Long Shaitels are not the problem. It is trying to look sexy that is. Which involves a lot more than wearing a long wig. I know a lot of young  Orthodox married women that wear long Shaitels and yet  they are as modest as many of those Orthodox women that wear short Shaitels.

I am not going to go into details about what ‘looking sexy’ means. (Which is what is meant by ‘looking slutty’ with respect to Orthodox women.) But the phrase ‘Hot Chanie’ might give you an indication of it. Let us just say you know it when you see it. It is not about hair length. It is about a combination of factors that – might – include wearing a long Shaitel. Or might not. 

The fact is that I feel a bit uncomfortable discussing this subject.  Shaitels are not exactly on the top of my list of things we ought to be concerned with. But when perfectly innocent people start being harangued about their lack of modesty because the kind of Shaitels they wear have been declared immodest, that raises my hackles. I must therefore protest. It is hard enough for many religious women to cover their hair at all. Why make it more difficult?

We all want to look our best. Women that buy long Shaitels do so for that reason. And those Shaitels ain’t cheap.

I have in fact never understood why a married woman’s hair is considered Erva (nakedness) when that same hair was perfectly fine before she was married. Be that as it may, the Halacha is clear. Married women must cover their hair. Why must we make it more difficult for them than necessary?

I know quite a few women that would not cover their hair if they could not wear a Shaitel that flattered them. As noted they do not see the logic of exposed hair changing its status from permitted to forbidden the moment she receives her wedding ring from her fiancĂ©.  In some cases these women come from homes where their mothers did not cover their hair. Mothers that were by any other measure as modest as could be. They have nonetheless made a commitment that their mothers have not.  Some of those women will nevertheless make a commitment regardless of any obstacle put in their way. But some will never even start if it is made difficult for them

If the goal is to turn some of these women off of covering their hair, the current harangue against Long Shaitels is a good start.