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| What kind of Chinuch do these parents give their children? (TOI) |
The Chilul HaShem was a standup comedy routine that was so
vulgar, the it almost made AGT judge Howard Stern blush. And Stern is perhaps the most vulgar radio and TV personality in show business.
What made it a Chilul HaShem was that this young contestant was wearing
a Kipa. That almost certainly means he is an Orthodox Jew. And his father was seen on that show wearing
one too.
Normally I would be praising Orthodox Jews who are not embarrassed
to wear a Kipa in public. It would certainly be understandable if he removed it
during the performance so as not to influence the judges. They might see it as
odd and therefore prejudice their vote. What this tells me is that he is proud
to be an Orthodox Jew and wants people to know it, despite any negative consequences
that may result.
Last year on this same show, a young boy about the same age
wore a Kipa too. He sang and played the piano. And what he did was a Kiddush
Hashem. He not only wore his Kipa proudly he refused to perform during the 3
weeks where Halacha forbids listening to live music. He made that a condition
of being on the show. That took guts. He could have easily jeopardized his
chances of appearing. There were probably tens of thousands of contestants that
would have been happy to take his place. I’m sure he knew that. But he stood by
his beliefs. They were more important to him than success. As it turned out,
AGT allowed him to do that. And he did quite well on the show.
But in this case, I wish he had taken it off. Telling vulgar
jokes at such a young age in front of millions of people is not the image we
ought to be projecting to the world. Kidoshim Tihiyu, the Torah tells us
(Vayikra 19:2). We are to be a holy people. Rashi comments that the reason this Parsha
follows the section on Arayos (forbidden sexual relationships) is to tell us
that wherever one finds a ‘fence’ to such acts, one will find holiness. The obvious reverse of that is that where one
finds Arayos, one will not find holiness. This young boy was anything but holy
on that show. He projected unholiness.
What this young fellow did by his ‘act’ is tell the world
that Orthodox Jews are vulgar people. This is not being a light unto the
nations. It is a Chilul HaShem for a holy nation to present itself in that way.
What lesson does that teach the nations? How does this reflect the Godliness
that our behavior is supposed to represent?
When I saw this segment (which has been all over the internet)
I was disgusted and embarrassed. I was embarrassed for the 12 year old on
stage, embarrassed for his parents, embarrassed for his school, and embarrassed
for Klal Yisroel.
That the judges and audience loved it makes no difference.
The Jewish people are not on this earth to win popularity contests. Our mission
in the world is to be a light unto the nations. It is that for which we are to appreciate
applause, not what this young boy did.
But my outrage is not directed so much at this young boy. It
is directed at his parents, who seemed to not only approve, but celebrate what
their son did.
Really? Is this the Chinuch you are giving your children? Is
this your Orthodoxy? Is this how you think the world should see us? Is this
what your ancestors envisioned for their offspring? Do you think the boys
grandparents or great grandparents would approve? What are you teaching your
children with this? Which Pesukim in the Torah tell you that this is OK? Which Gemarah?
Yes, laughter is an important part of life. The Talmudic
sage Rava always started off his Shiurim with a bit of humor, so as to get the
attention of his students in a positive way. They would then be more motivated
to learn from his lectures. Is this what happened here? And did Rava tell these
kinds of jokes?
What kind of Chinuch did the parents get to make them feel
it is OK to let their son do this in front of millions of people while wearing
a Kipa?
What makes this even more egregious is the fact that the
father denied on camera that he had anything to do with the material his son
performed and that his wife (the boy’s mother) never heard that material before. The fact is that the father did one of those jokes himself in almost
the exact same manner as his son. It was at a comedy club available for viewing
on YouTube.
And what about the day school this boy attends? How are they
going to deal with this? Are they going to just let it slide? I don’t think
that is an option. This requires a serious rebuke of not only the boy but of
his parents. There are obviously some major Chinuch issues to be addressed
here. In my view the school needs to educate both the boy and his parents about
what is proper behavior for an observant Jew. What I can’t understand is why the
parents haven’t learned that yet? What kind of homes were they raised in? What
kind of teachers gave the impression that this could ever be OK?
What a shame. On the surface the parents seemed very normal
and very likable people. The relationship between the parents and their son
seemed to be very loving. The parents are obviously very supportive of this child. All
good things. Things from which we can all learn. But there is something very
wrong with parents being proud of their son’s vulgarity in front of millions of
people.
I don’t wish this family any ill. In fact, I have no issue
with young boys succeeding in show business, provided they do not make a Chilul
HaShem in the process. I would only ask him to clean up his act. And ask that
his parents help him do that. You don’t have to be blue to succeed as a stand
up comedian. Ask Bill Cosby. His routines are never blue. And there aren’t too
many comedians who are as successful as he is. Follow his example and stop making a Chilul HaShem!
