Thursday, July 08, 2010

Smuggling Cocaine – The Torah Way

Guest Post by Avi Reich

The following story appears on the Fox News website:

JERUSALEM (AP) — Police say they've arrested a pair of ultra-Orthodox Jewish men suspected of trying to smuggle $1 million of pure cocaine into Israel from Brazil.

Police spokesman Micky Rosenfeld said on Thursday that the two former seminary students, aged 21 and 20, were stopped at Israel's international airport overnight.

He says police officers found about 22 pounds (10 kilograms) of cocaine in their luggage.

Rosenfeld says police had been tracking the two men for some time. He says Israeli police informed their Brazilian counterparts ahead of time to help identify the pair's suppliers.

Police say the cocaine was headed to the Israeli market. Israeli police estimate its street value at around $1 million.

I’ve seen the light. I now realize that I have been all wrong. These are my people. I will no longer abandon them. Chilul HaShem - Shmilul HaShem!

In that spirit I present now a guest post by Charedi Kollel member Avi Reich.

Judge Us by Our Torah True Standards

I am sick and tired of people bashing us. We Yeshivalite work hard. We sit morning, noon, and night learning Torah. But we also have families to feed. The accursed Israeli government simply is not Machshiv Torah and do not pay us a large enough welfare payment. What is one to do if he is an Avreich with a large family to feed? ...who sacrifices everything for Torah!

Obviously we cannot spend any time learning a Parnassa. That would take away valuable time from Limud HaTorah. Can you even imagine giving up learning a R’ Chaim for even a minute – Chas V’Shalom - to learn... say accounting? The very idea that we can be Mevatel Torah for that is disgusting and frankly - anti Torah! It takes a lot of time to understand with depth even one Sugya in the Gemarah with all the Rishonim. And what about R’ Chaim? How can anyone learn the Rambam without a R’ Chaim? We should give any of that up?! For what?! An accounting course?! Feh!

No way!

Like I said. We have to feed our families. If a wonderful opportunity like smuggling pure cocaine comes along why not take advantage of it? After all we are not going to distribute it amongst our own - Chas V’Sholom.

The Israeli Arabs like it? They're Mechuiv Misah anyway. Certainly they violated at least one of the Sheva Mitzvos. No? If they overdose - so what?! They are only getting what they deserve.

Chilonim like it? Let them indulge! Why not supply it to them and make some money?! Who cares about addiction problems or worse. They are a bunch of Reshaim and hate us anyway! Let them rot!

Perhaps some Datim might indulge? Who cares! They aren't really Torah true. Most of them are Apikursim anyway.Who needs them?!

The main thing is that no Charedi will touch it! Baruch HaShem.

I simply cannot understand why anyone would object to this unless they were anti Frum.

It’s a shame these wonderful young Yeshiva Bachurim got caught. They need to learn how to smuggle better! Now that would be a course worth giving up a R’ Chaim for!

But now that they have been arrested we need to do something fast. We all know how Charedim are treated in Israeli jails. Ever hear of water-boarding?

We need to make the world understand the truth about these young Yeshivalite. They are Tzadikim! They are Baalei Chesed! They have spent their entire lives learning Torah. And now they are in jail. They have not hurt anyone. They were only smuggling drugs. Where is it written that this is an Aveira?! L'Hephech - they are getting people what they want. The only reason they are being punished is because they are Charedi!

If there was ever a case of Pidyon Shevuyim this is it. We need to go to the streets. We cannot let this stand. The Reshaim Gemurim must be protested to the fullest extent possible. Kavod HaTortah demands it! The police are the Sitra Achara. We have to show the world that we care about our fellow Jews - Jews who sacrifice everything for Torah. By simply trying to make a better life for their families they were thrown in jail and will be tried in a kangaroo court!

We cannot let this stand. The Sitra Achara must be defeated!

There will be a rally in Kikkar Shabbos tonight. We are expecting tens of thousands of participants to be there for our Achenu Bnei Yisroel. The need has never been greater than now! Their wives and children need our help to get their husbands and fathers - two Yeshivalite -released. They are victims of a corrupt society – that values a captured Chiloni soldier more than those who sit and learn B’Hasmada Rabbah. Please bring your rotten tomatoes and a mouthful of spit.

Chazak V’Amatz!

Disclaimer: We are not responsible for those who will be setting fires to dumpsters tonight. They are not from our Machane.


According to the Hebrew website Chadrei Charedim the smugglers in the news story are Charedim who went OTD. AP apparently mis-characterized them as ultra-Orthodox. As such this parody does not apply specifically to them and I would not have written the post this way - if at all. It may have instead been about Charedi youth who went OTD.

But Since there have been Charedim involved in public displays of all kinds of misdeeds - including drug related crime - and Charedi reactions have been along the lines of this post - I will let it stand as a parody of that.

2nd Update:

On the other hand - Chadrei Charedim isn't that reliable either. I guess AP wasn't all wrong and this post definitely applies. As the following video shows:

Hat Tip: MS and VIN