An Apology- and the Return of Full Moderation

Today’s earlier post on Rabbi Amnon Yitzhak is based entirely on information from the Ynet article on this subject. In that post I strongly criticized Rabbi Yitzhak for flogging a 'sinner' who violated his concept of Tznius. Apparently the flogging was symbolic. Ynet is usually pretty reliable. But not this time. They ‘forgot’ to mention that little detail about the flogging being symbolic. So I apologize for my reaction to an event that apparently did not really happen. At least not in the way I thought it did.

But I do not apologize for my general criticism of Rabbi Yitzhak. His methods of imposing symbolic flogging as a form of Teshuva are at best questionable. And his quest to ban Yaakov Shwecky for Tznius reasons are not only counterproductive - if he succeeds it can ruin the man’s career! He will also be depriving Shwecky’s many fans of his terrific and inspirational music.

As for my speculation about his possible deviancy, I stand by what I said. He is too obsessed with Tznius issues. I still agree with my rabbinic Charedi friend about people who tend to focus their efforts on Tznius issues in overly zealous ways. His reaction to mixed gender concerts are extreme.

But I never said he was actually deviant. I only said that charismatic anti establishment people like him are more likely be so than the general population. They are the ones who create cults – the way Jim Jones, David Koresh, and Burka lady did. I do not think Rabbi Yitzhak has crossed that line yet nor did I say he did. But his obsession with Tznius is clear.

I would normally delete the article but I have basically been away from my blog since this morning. Since there have been so many comments - in deference to those who took the time to comment I have decided to leave it up along with all the comments except for the few I deleted. Instead I have footnoted the end of that post and referred readers to my apology in this one.

On an unrelated issue - I have unfortunately turned moderation back on. I decided to give an un-moderated format another try. I was out of town to attend a wedding in Monsey, New York -staying on a few days for a mini vacation. I knew my moderating duties would be limited and I did not want to stifle the conversation – so I turned off moderation.

Unfortunately there are some simple minded and ignorant people who willfully violated my posting rules. I have deleted their comments and those responding to them. I apologize to my readers for having to put up with it.

I also want to express my appreciation to the vast majority of commenters for keeping the level of conversation and debate on a high level.

I am back in Chicago now and full moderation is unfortunately back too.

Amnon Yitzhak

A prominent Charedi Rav I know has told me privately many times that he strongly suspects many of the Charedi zealots – both in the US and Israel – who overly concern themselves with matters of public Tznius are very likely sexual deviants from whose population sex abusers are drawn. I tend to agree with him. For example Those in Meah Shearim who beat up a woman because she spoke to a man other than her husband in public was an easy excuse for them and probably a sexual turn on for them.

I think it is also true of charismatic religious cult leaders – especially those who tend to be anti establishment. We don’t have to search too far in the non Jewish world to see the perverted sexual acts by charismatic leaders in the name of their god. Jim Jones and David Koresh come to mind. They had sexual relations with many – perhaps all - of their female cult members. In the Jewish world Bruria Karen – the ‘Burka Lady’ of Bet Shemesh comes to mind. Her own children were found to be involved in incestuous relationships with each other.

These people tend command a lot of respect and a huge following – hammering away on the need for Teshuva. Usually for sins related to sexual activity in one form or another. They try and project an image as defenders of Tznius. But as the Charedi Rav has pointed out – their true motive is very likely an unhealthy obsession with sex.

Rabbi Amnon Yitzhak is a charismatic individual who apparently has a huge following. He is a Baal Teshuva from Yemen who is now himself very involved with Kiruv - reaching out to secular Jews. If I understand correctly his approach is Kabbalistic and he apparently attracts huge audiences wherever he speaks. I personally have never understood his appeal. But to each his own and his appeal attracts big numbers. He has appeared in Chicago. Many times if I recall correctly.

He is currently on a tear to destroy religious singers who perform at mixed male-female events. Although I vehemently disagree with him I concede he has a right to promote that idea of sex segregated concerts . What he does not have a right to do is destroy people or their careers.

He recently approached Rav Aharon Leib Steinman in an unsuccessful attempt to get singer Yaakov Shwekey banned because he performs to mixed crowds. Thankfully Rav Steinman did not buy what Yitzhak is selling.

But his latest shenanigans defy rationality. An article in Ynet – if accurate - puts him so far outside the pale that he deserves to be condemned by every Rav of every persuasion. It not only crosses the line but makes him one of the most reprehensible and dangerous human beings on the face of the earth. He has convinced a singer who has become a Baal Teshuva to allow himself to be flogged. 39 lashes! With a leather whip! From Ynet:

The sinner lifted his shirt and recited the confession. A court clerk pressed him against the tree pole and began flogging him with a special whip.

Why? Because a religious court convened by Yitzhak - and of which he was a part (see photo) - determined he committed a sin worthy of Malkus Arbaim - 40 (39) lashes. This is the biblical directive to be flogged for - and limited to - certain types of sin. Singing to a mixed crowd is not one of them. But that is what this singer was biblically flogged for. He sang before an integrated crowd of men and women..

According to the article the rabbis on the Beis Din said that anyone who causes men and women to dance together has no place in the world to come. So this naïve singer – believing in Rabbi Yitzhaks holiness’ was convinced by him to repent via this method of ‘atonement.’ He agreed - praying that this flogging atone for all the sins committed from his birth to date.

What kind of monster advises people to get whipped as a means of atonement today? Is he out if his mind? I know of no Rosh Yeshiva or Posek; Gadol or Chasidic Rebbe; Rav or Dayan - past or present - who ever advocated such a thing. No matter how right wing they were.

This fellow has to be completely discredited. I call upon all Orthodox religious leaders to do so. He is a danger to the Jewish people – both physically and spiritually. And as my Charedi rabbinic friend suggested about people like this - his obsession with Tznius indicates a likelihood that he has his own sexually deviant issues. Should we wait until something worse happens before we stop him? Is advocating flogging people for singing in front of men and women not enough of a deviancy? The time is now. Before he whips anyone else – or worse!

Update (10:15 PM CDT): Some of my comments in this post are based on erroneous information contained in the Ynet article I based it on. I apologize for the error and my comments - and refer readers to my latest post for further details.

Potential Gedolim or Yeshivishe Rednecks?

Guest Post by Rabbi Dovid Landesman

Rabbi Dovid Landesman is a frequent commenter and an occasional a guest poster here. He is a unique individual who identifies as Charedi and yet his views on issues of the day are often in complete concert with my own. And although I can’t really be pegged I tend to most closely identify with what might be called right wing modern Orthodoxy. The following essay by Rabbi Landesman reinforces my belief that moderate Charedim and right wing modern Orthodox Jews are the wave of the future. It is they who will form a new centrism. This new centrism will be a social rather than a hashkafic unit with high compatibility between the two groups.

What makes this particular contribution by Rabbi Landesman remarkable is the consonance it has with my own views on the issues he touches upon in the essay. I have expressed virtually identical views many times. He is about to publish a new book entitled: Food for Thought – No Hechsher Required scheduled for release in January. The following essay is taken from that book.

One of my sensitivities that has become more acute through the years is the discomfort I feel whenever I listen to lashon hakodesh being butchered by speakers who seem to feel that fealty to the rules of grammar, proper pronunciation and emphasis on the proper syllable are the unique purview of subscribers to Zionism and/or Modern Orthodoxy. Rav Yaakov Kaminetsky zt”l, in a not terribly successful attempt to get us to be serious about our Hebrew language classes in Mesifta Torah Vodaath, told us that he once discovered a major halachic error in a well known acharon that was based on a simple dikduk mistake. Regrettably, we were not suitably impressed.

Personally, I cringe whenever I hear learned rabbis and roshei yeshiva refer to the zechusim [should be zechuyot] of our forefathers, or the outstanding anivus [should be anavah] of the gedolim of yesteryear. No less painful are the announcements in shuls respectfully requesting that the congregants not leave their taleisim [should be tallitot] on the benches or informing them that kiddush dedication opportunities are available for a number of Shabbosim [should be Shabbatot].

A related issue is the tendency within segments of the observant community to consider fluency in a language other than yeshivish as indicative of weakness in one’s level of observance. While that trend might not be new, there was a period of time when this was clearly not policy in the yeshivot. When I was studying in the beit midrash at Torah Vodaath, the yeshiva sponsored a weekly homiletics class with Rabbi Moshe Sherer z’l. The course was ostensibly directed toward talmidim who intended to enter the rabbinate and participation was voluntary. But both R. Yaakov and R. Schorr zt’l made it quite clear that they considered public speaking ability to be important and in no way was its practice to be considered bittul Torah.

Listening to young men and women attending the seminaries and yeshivot of Eretz Yisrael, I am often forced to restrain myself and refrain from reacting violently to some of the expressions that I hear bandied about. I’m not sure how many more times I can silently sit by and hear another young woman describe how kedushadik her trip to Tzefat was or a young man relate how he can no longer daven in a certain shul because of the lack of a Torahdik atmosphere.

Admittedly, am Yisrael has far more important problems that need to be our priority. Nevertheless, I find it necessary to go on public record as decrying this phenomenon which, I believe, is easily rectifiable. It simply demands a bit of effort on the part of rabbanim and mechanchot to teach their charges that lashon hakodesh, as the language that the Ribbono shel Olam used to create the world, has enormous import and therefore deserves to be treated with respect and awe. Furthermore, the schools must emphasize that the ability to cogently and intelligently present one thoughts are a skill that must be developed even if only because it provides one with an opportunity to make a simple, elementary kiddush Hashem.

Why then this rant? I have a gnawing suspicion that the inarticulate nature suggest that you are not a part of this group, use of yeshivish will enable you to reassure your listeners that your core values are still intact.

Often, and this is especially true of new initiates into the yeshiva world, lack of fluency in yeshivish can cause hilarious mistakes. My wife once taught a girl who told her that a friend’s shidduch was mamash gebrochts [she meant to say bashert].

I wonder if there has not been a dumbing down of the general curriculums in the yeshivot and girls’ schools to insure that the forces of modernity and progress not permeate the walls of separation. I admit that I am faced with an internal contradiction here. On the one hand, I fully accept that much of the society around us is inimical and at times even pernicious and we must therefore limit our exposure and create barriers. Nonetheless, the bubble that we have created, along with the introduction of frumspeak and even more frumthink into our schools, has contributed to a qualitative decline in the yeshiva world.

I would add that the downplaying of communication skills has had collateral affect as well; it has led to the establishment of what I refer to as yeshivishe red necks [what an image!] who disdain any knowledge or information that is not clearly related to their limited, immediate interests or whose source is outside their community.

This, in my mind, has to be a serious impediment to two of the most critical components in education – curiosity and creativity. Should we not be concerned that since the passing of R. Dessler and R. Hutner zt’l, no major works of machashavah have been produced – this in a generation confronted by incomparable progress in science and technology?!

A number of years ago, I published an article quoting R. Elya Meir Bloch zt’l who declared that the reason why Agudat Yisrael had never managed to attract the majority of observant Jews in Eastern Europe was that it had always had to wait for the Mizrachi to come out in favor of something so as to determine what it was against. According to R. Bloch, one can not build a successful and popular movement whose focus is on negativity. In my analysis, the yeshiva world today has become a victim of this type of negativity.

Instead of confronting modernity with confidence that our mesorah has the strength to withstand the challenge, we have retreated behind walls whose height and breadth are continuously increased to deal with new potential breakthroughs. Ideas that do manage to permeate the barriers are subject to disparagement as unworthy of debate.

We blame the internet, movies and television for the cancer that we find eating away at our families, ignoring the fact that this cancer is hardly limited to those who have been exposed to the media. In many conversations with roshei yeshiva, teachers and mechanchot, I have heard a common theme expressed; too many kids are just shells. The mechanchim in the trenches do not decry that their charges are hedonists mindlessly pursuing pleasure. They complain that the kids simply don’t care about
anything important.

Obviously, this is not true of the entire student populations of our institutions; there is remarkable hatmadah in many yeshivot and phenomenal acts of chessed in our Beit Yaakovs. Nonetheless, there are also many kids whose minds are as vapid as their expressions. Might it not be possible that our system is what has created this?

In an essay published in 1963, R. Dessler zt’l writes that the yeshivot of Eastern Europe rejected the idea of teaching students secular studies because it was felt that a dual curriculum would prevent the yeshivot from producing gedolai Yisrael. They realized that this decision would result in heavy casualties in terms of the many students who were not suited for this kind of study, but felt that this was a price worth paying.

R. Dessler acknowledges that the Frankfurt derech of T.I.D.E. was far more successful than the olam hayeshivot in terms of producing ba’alei batim8 committed to Torah and mitzvah observance. However, he criticizes the Frankfurt derech, writing that because of its open nature it failed to produce more than a handful of gedolai Yisrael.

In exploring the issue, I offer the following possibility for consideration. Is it possible that R. Dessler's opinion was really time dependent rather than a statement of policy to be followed at all times? Remember that he was writing in the aftermath of WWII, when the scholarly leadership of observant Jewry had been decimated. Perhaps at that juncture it was critical that the yeshivot cloister themselves so as to rebuild that which had been lost.

Is there not precedent that at certain times, given the exigencies that a community faces, changes are made to best serve the immediate needs of a community? Even the foremost opponents of T.I.D.E. – R. Baruch Ber Lebowitz and R. Elchanan Wasserman zt’l –admitted that given the natureof what was transpiring in Germany, R. Hirsch’s derech was permitted as a hora’at sha’a. Can the same not be said about the founding of the modern yeshivot – e.g., Volozhin?

Is it unreasonable to contend that they were established, as R. Dessler writes, as incubators for future gedolim because at that point in history, it was critical to create a safe haven where Torah could be nurtured in the face of a Jewish society challenged internally by reform and externally by democracy and the industrial revolution?

The essential question is what is the proper structure for the yeshivot today, sixty years after the holocaust, when the observant population has grown to an extent that was unimaginable at the time that R. Dessler wrote his essay. Should we continue using a curriculum designed to develop gedolim knowing that many talmidim will go off the derech because they are not being reached?

Can this still be justified given that the yeshivot have been replenished and thrive? Is there a rationale for our continued focus on the elite when the student population of the schools far exceeds that of Eastern Europe before WWII – both in absolute numbers as well as in the percentage of the observant population enrolled?

Or, perhaps, now that we have an independent state, the yeshivot have a concurrent responsibility to create an infrastructure for the entire community and can no longer consider themselves as proprietors of an ivory tower. Perhaps the time has come to reexamine the curriculum of the olam hayeshivot so that it can serve the general needs of a klal that needs to be self sustaining.

Granted that doing so will elicit a price, for individuals with the potential to become great in Torah may well choose to enter professions if they are given the choice. Indeed, the yeshivot as a whole might produce fewer gedolim if we change the curriculum of the schools and offer more serious limudei chol allowing graduates to become contributors to the State’s economy.

But, in R. Dessler’s own words, perhaps that is the price we have to pay?

The ‘Pied Piper’

Guest Post by Paul Shaviv

There are certain teachers that are very popular and have what might be called Charisma. They can be great role models and motivators. But not all charismatic teachers are that way. They are what we might call the pied piper. And they are actually quite destructive. These pied pipers tend to be somewhat anti establishment a characteristic that is very appealing to adolescents who are trying to assert themselves through their own developing personalities.

These teachers tend to break boundaries and in doing so become very attractive to their students – especially if their home situations are less than ideal. The pied piper becomes substitute a father figure and certain adolescents willfully follow them in an almost abnormal way. Often, very often, these pied pipers turn out to have a sexually abusive dimension.

Paul Shaviv is the award winning Director of Education at TanenbaumCHAT - the Community High School of the Greater Toronto Jewish community. He has submitted the following extract from his excellent book: 'THE JEWISH HIGH SCHOOL: A complete management guide' wherein he deals with this issue.

The ‘Pied-Piper’ is one of the most difficult situations for a Principal to deal with.

Many excellent and highly professional teachers have elements of charisma in their personalities. In the ‘Pied Piper’ situation a powerfully charismatic teacher has exceeded appropriate boundaries. The teacher’s personality has become the centre of the classroom rather than the course content. A ‘Pied Piper’ will deeply affect and influence some students – but will almost always leave a trail of emotional wreckage in his/her wake.

‘Pied Pipers’ - charismatic teachers who misuse their charisma - are often themselves deeply immature, but their immaturity is emotional, not intellectual, and it is not always obvious. They can be brilliant in inspiring students to go beyond their wildest expectations, and are often regarded (by their following of students, by parents, and by the Board or the community) as the ‘most important’ or ‘best’ members of staff. There is always, however, a price to be paid

One of the effects of charisma is to convince the recipient that he or she is the centre of the charismatic personality’s concern. A teenage student (or a particular class) may feel as though he, she or they is/are the protégé(s) of the charismatic teacher. The moment they realize that they are not (sometimes when the teacher ‘moves on to the next’), deep emotions come into play. Many charismatic teachers will lavish attention on a student or group of students – as long as the student(s) do things the teacher’s way, or accept every piece of advice or “philosophy” or Torah uncritically.

The moment the student shows independence or objectivity – they are dropped. As soon as they are dropped, they are written out of the teacher’s story. Deep disillusion sets in. The student(s) are devastated. Often such students, very hurt, leave the school. Whatever brand of identity and loyalty the ‘Pied Piper’ has inculcated – religion, sport, poetry, art, politics – may be abandoned overnight. The next set of ‘favorites’ takes their place.

Tears are a feature of meetings between the abandoned students, their parents, and the Administration. Mild characteristics of cult leaders may be observed.

Other parents, however, will rave about how their son/daughter “adores” Mr./Ms/ or Rabbi X, and is “learning so much from them”. Events linked to that teacher will be showcase events, and in the Principal (or Head of Department) will come to be dependent on the teacher. “We need something special for the prize-giving...or the ground-breaking … or the community event… can you put something together?”

The teacher will protest that the time is short, and it’s impossible, but will, of course, accept and do a fabulous job.

The problem is that at core, these are not educational relationships.

The emotional dependency and entanglement between teacher and student leads to boundaries being crossed. The teacher throws open his/her house to the students. Teens idolize the teacher, and dangerous fantasies begin to develop. Boundaries are crossed; the usual rules don’t apply to the Pied Piper, or, sometimes, his/her students. The ‘Pied Piper’ will solve the teen’s angst and will sympathize with their intimate family problems.

The teacher becomes party to knowledge about students and their families that reinforces the ‘Pied Piper’s” view that s/he is the only teacher who is “really” reaching the students. (Disdain for other teachers is another common symptom.)

The teacher, however, is neither a trained counselor nor a social worker. That knowledge becomes power. A ‘Pied Piper’ can end up running a ‘school within a school’.

In the classroom, the teacher will often employ techniques (and texts) which take students to the extremes of emotion or logic, and will then triumphantly show them how they, the teacher, are holding the key to resolution:

At this moment, you have agreed that life has no meaning -- but here is the answer. Part of the reason of why these teachers are difficult to deal with is that they are often blissfully unaware (perhaps deliberately unaware) of their own emotional power, and see their activities in the school as huge self-sacrifice: Look at how many extra hours I put in!

Faced with this situation, the Principal is in a quandary. Parents are telling the Board that this teacher should be promoted. Local rabbis are letting it be known that “X” is “doing wonderful work with the kids” – and in fact may even be “the only teacher in the school who’s really worth anything”. And the truth is that ‘X” is contributing a huge amount of positive things to the school.

The other teachers, in the main, cordially dislike ‘X’, for both good and bad reasons. The more emotionally stable teachers see an adult playing ‘mind games’ with the students, and feel – probably with some justification - that the influence is ‘unhealthy’. They are also angry at Administration for allowing this situation to develop. Other teachers are simply jealous of ‘X’’s influence over the students, which they cannot even dream of. Those that choose to drink coffee with ‘X’ in the staff room (although, in my experience, charismatic teachers often avoid the staff room) are also ‘groupies’ – themselves frequently the less mature teachers.

Although under pressure to turn a blind eye to what is going on – “X is doing so much good!” - the Principal must act to bring these situations under control. Make sure you have some facts to use as examples – inappropriate meetings, student distress, parental concerns, students asking to join his/her class (or drop it) – and invite the teacher to a meeting, with another Administrator present.

I need to talk to you about your relationships in the school, which is causing increasing concern. I have asked my colleague, Mr/Ms/Rabbi G to sit in on this meeting. Being a teacher can be very difficult, and part of the difficulty is drawing boundaries between intense, but professional and appropriate relationships, and relationships which go over those boundaries. I am very apprehensive that you are crossing some red lines, and for your own protection, and for the welfare of the school, we need to have a serious talk. Let me go over some examples of what I mean……

Curb any excesses that are taking place (some of which may emerge during the meeting, as the teacher, protesting, goes to great lengths to show how much he/she cares for the students and how close he/she is to them). Lay down guidelines for future conduct; and try and save for the school the best of what the teacher has to offer. The meeting will probably have to deal with:

• The teacher’s professional duties as a member of school staff

• The teacher’s relationship to students

• The teacher’s relationship to other teachers

The exact list will obviously vary according to circumstances, but may well include required undertakings from the teacher that:

• S/he will strive to act professionally and objectively, delivering the classroom curriculum with equal attention to all students, and maintaining proper professional relationships with colleagues

• Inappropriate discussions and/or introduction of inappropriate material in the classroom will cease

• Contacts with students outside the classroom on matters not connected with the curriculum, direct or indirect, will cease

• No meetings will take place with students off school premises or in any non-professional context without prior consultation and the permission of the Administration

• Students approaching the teacher for counseling or advice on personal matters will be directed to a school Guidance Counselor or other qualified professional. The teacher will not be concerned with the emotional issues of students

• The teacher will immediately disclose to the Principal any event or incident concerning a student that may be construed as being outside their professional responsibility or outside professional boundaries

A letter summarizing the meeting should be sent to the teacher, with a copy in their personal file. The charismatic teacher’s behavior may lead to situations that expose the school to legal and other action. It is the Principal’s duty to safeguard the educational and professional integrity of the school.

Is the Wolf Knocking at our Door?

Are we experiencing the beginning of long predicted crash of our religious educational system? One might be tempted to view the two recent school closings in Lakewood that way. As I have said many times the system as we know it is unsustainable. Even in the wealthier communities where the high tuition is more affordable, most schools seem to operate on deficits.

That’s because we have a seemingly unsolvable dilemma – a conundrum if you will. One that has been a niggling problem for years if not decades. On the one hand we insist on giving our children the best education possible. To that extent we want the best and the brightest people teaching in our schools.

Although teaching involves a certain degree of altruistic sacrifice, no teacher is going to starve his or her family and accept poverty wages. Good people who might be inclined to teach are often sought after by industry for more lucrative positions and will either never teach or will leave Chinuch after a while to get those better jobs. Even though when they do leave Chinuch - being altruistic - they do so with a certain degree of regret.

If we want good teachers we have to pay them good wages. If we want good schools we need to have good enrichment programs - and good administrators - and good facilities.

If full tuition were paid by all parents it might cover a school’s basic expenses. But very few people pay full tuition. Most parents are on some degree scholarship allowance based on their means. Some pay very little. And in a few cases no tuition is paid. The bottom line is that a lot of money needs to be raised by a school board to cover their budgets.

Increasingly those budgets are never met. Shortfalls seem to be increasing every year as scholarships increase and donations decrease. If the deficit becomes large enough teachers don’t get paid on time. Sometimes not for months! And if deficits increase even more, schools start closing.

In communities like Lakewood where there are large families and generally lower incomes - deficits are probably huge to begin with. Perhaps teachers there are willing to sacrifice more taking lower salaries to begin with. But that does not compensate for the huge and increasing shortfalls they experience.

Tuition is based on cost per child. The way scholarships generally work is that no parent is asked to pay more than they can afford. So if one has a certain amount available for tuition that is what they pay regardless of how many children they have in the school.

If for example a tuition is $10,000 per child per year, and one has ten children – not an unusual size in Lakewood – there is no way they are going to pay 100,000 per year. Not if the entire pre-tax annual income is $40,000 or less.

Philanthropy in those schools becomes exponentially important. But in the current economic climate donations are down. And the demographic trend in places like Lakewood means enrollment is up without any increase in tuition income.

I am not happy to see my prediction of unsustainablity come true. But if the two school closing in Lakewood (as reported in Orthonomics and elsewhere) are any indication, the wolf is at the door.

I have no solution to the over-all problem. Tuition is at an all time high – as are scholarships. The parent body of the entire Orthodox world is being taxed to the hilt. Almost every parent struggles to pay their tuition obligations no matter how much money they make - unless they are among the very wealthy. Lakewood parents are not alone in that regard.

But one thing is certain. The push that the right wing Yeshiva world has towards staying in Kollel for as long as possible and downplaying, ignoring, or even ridiculing the importance of preparing for a decent living is a major contributing factor to the crisis in places like Lakewood. If there weren’t so many low income parents with such large families in Lakewood the tuition crisis might not be so bad and two schools totaling 600 students might not have had to close. I’m not saying they would have been in the black. But they would at least still exist. Those 600 children would be in the classrooms and their teachers would not be out of work.

What do we do in the short term? Like I said I have no joy in seeing 600 children without a school to go to and dozens of teachers (or more) out of work.

There has been some suggestion that wealthy parents and Baalei Battim substantially increase their donations. I agree. A little belt tightening would not hurt some of them. No one suggests - least of all me - that they should give away all their wealth or that they should not lead the kind of lifestyles they can afford. A person has a right to enjoy the fruits of their labor and their wealth.

But there comes a time when community welfare should take precedence and a few luxuries forgone. This may be one of those times. I know it’s difficult to get an increase in donations from a multi millionaire who has lost millions of dollars in the current economy. But if a fellow earns 10 million dollars a year and that is cut in half - that still leaves him with 5 million.

How much of that does he need to live on – even at a luxurious lifestyle? A million? Two million? That leaves 3 million that can be used for community purposes. I appeal to these wealthy Jews to make the sacrifice now when it is needed and give away most of that 5 million to these schools. Let them also limit donations to their own community. Anyei Ircha Kodmon.

But we cannot expect the wealthy to pay all of our bills for us. Even just our tuition bills. My suggestion is only meant as a stopgap measure. As I have said a million times - the paradigm has to change. If the right wing leadership does not see the handwriting on the wall, then the system will collapse. And it may have already started.

Charming Your Socks (and other things) Off

Child molesters are often very charming people. They are often very well integrated into a community - even respected as contributing individuals who will give of their time and money towards good causes. They come in all shapes and sizes and all manner of Hashkafos. They can be very religious in their outward observance or appearance or can be modern in dress and outlook. The common feature among them is that they are very accepted and often even beloved.

That makes them far more dangerous than the stereotypical image one might have of a molesters as an unkempt lowlife who lurks behind the shadows. I don’t think that stereotype even exists. Or if it does it is miniscule in comparison to the typical molester that is well integrated into family and community.

That may explain why it has been so difficult to get certain religious communities to cooperate with authorities when one of their members is accused of a sex crime. It doesn’t excuse it. But it explains it.

Respected members of the community who act incredulous when they are accused give rabbinic leaders the impression that they have been falsely accused. And since relationships are often very close and very positive, the victim is instead accused of being a perpetrator. He (or she) is accused of making false accusations. The accusers are immediately suspected of having ulterior motives.

After all why should anyone believe a child, pre-teen, or adolescent, each of whom do not have any real credibility built up yet in their young lives? Certainly their accusations are seen as suspicious over the strong denials of the accused - an honored member of the community. That these young people start going OTD makes them even more suspect that their accusations are not true… that they have some sort of personal vendetta. Rabbinic courts will interpret that OTD came first and the accusations followed -thereby invalidating their testimony.

I think that is the mindset going into a case like the one in Lakewood right now. As reported in a lengthy article in APP.com, officials at Beis Medrash Govoha (BMG - more commonly known as Lakewood Yeshiva) are resisting attempts by public officials to seek justice for a young man who accused his day school Rebbe of molesting him. They insist that a Beis Din must be the first course of action.

The claim is that a Beis Din has the mechanism that can deal with it properly according to the laws of the Torah. Our religious laws have their own internal and just ways of dealing with it. They additionally believe (with some justification) that by going to the police an innocent man accused of a sex crime will have his reputation ruined forever. By going to a Beis Din first, they will be able to prevent that as everything there is handled with complete discretion and never made public. The obvious problem with this attitude is that there is an inherent bias in favor of the accused.

The loving father of the young victim could not abide by this rule. He was understandably shaken to the core that his son was molested by his Rebbe. He skipped the Beis Din and went directly to the police. That has resulted in untold additional grief for him and his family. From APP.com:

The decision of the child's father to go immediately to authorities last year has sparked reprisals, according to prosecutors and witnesses. Attempts were made to pressure the father to drop the charges. Fliers about him were circulated. In June, a Lakewood resident was arrested and charged with witness-tampering...

On June 30, at a charity fundraiser in Lakewood, a flier was circulated with a letter titled "How (the child's father) Makes a Mockery of the Torah.'' It described the father's choice to go to prosecutors as a "terrible deed,'' according to a translation from Hebrew. It also threatened to publicize the names of his supporters if they don't ""repent.''

"We hope that after tonight further letters will not be necessary,'' it stated. "However, let the perpetrators of this (shameful thing) know that ... we will not stop (until this horrible shame is removed from us).''

So instead of justice for the victim and his family we have persecution.

Was the father right to go to the authorities first? In my view he was. It has long ago been proven that religious courts are not equipped to handle these kinds of things. There is a tendency to err on the side of caution and protect the good name of the accused who may very well be a respected member of the community. That is understandable but as I pointed out – it reflects an unfair bias in favor of the accused. And that can easily lead to a massive injustice.

The truth is that the authorities are far more equipped to handle these things. They are trained to do so by professionals. And they do not have the intrinsic biases members of the Beis Din have that will improperly influence them. Even though the Beis Din tries to be as fair as possible and ignore that bias - it still exists.

These Rabbis are well meaning and they cite Halacha to support their positions. But there are other respectable rabbinic authorities who cite Halacha to support the position that a sex crime must be reported to the police immediately. If anything the side of caution the religious community should err on is the victim’s side. Not the side of the accused.

But these rabbis are so sure of themselves that they actually signed a proclamation that in part said the following (from the APP.com article):

"And if, in fact, he has transgressed and has gone so far as to bring the matter to the secular (nonreligious) courts, he is, perforce, obligated to do everything possible in order to remove any scintilla of accusation against the other party from the secular courts,'' it states, according to a translation by Rina Ne'eman Hebrew Language Services in New Brunswick paid for by the Press. "And it need not be stated that it is forbidden (for him) to continue to cooperate with them (secular courts) and to assist them in their efforts to pursue a Jew.''

The proclamation, dated in the spring of 2010, is signed by some of Lakewood's leading authorities on Jewish law, including heads of yeshivas and synagogues, Bais Din judges and two rabbis from the Beth Medrash Govoha yeshiva.

I have to ask – Are these rabbis not aware that significant numbers of abused young people go OTD because of attitudes like this? Some become so emotionally disturbed from the experience that they commit suicide? A suicide that could easily be prevented had the religious authorities been more sympathetic? …and tried to foster a more open environment for victims rather than a closed ‘hush hush’ attitude – lest it bring shame upon the community? Do they not remember abuse victim Motty Borger who committed suicide on his wedding night?

What will it take for them to realize that they do more harm with this approach than good? …that the right thing to do is work with the police and report any credible accusation to them as soon as possible? Lives are at stake here. And that is far more important than saving a reputation of an accused sex criminal.

The only thing the current attitude has accomplished is to allow the religious zealots to run rampant -harassing the victim and his family, and create yet another Chilul HaShem.

A Spiritual Threat

Several years ago, I had an opportunity to discuss the educational system in Israel with Rebbitzin Ella Soloveichik, the wife of my Rebbe, R’ Ahron Soloveichik. We were neighbors and often discussed issues of the day. I once lamented the fact that there was absolutely no value given to Limudei Chol – secular studies – by the Charedi establishment in Israel. And that there was therefore no Limudei Chol curriculum to be found in the Charedi school system at all except for elementary math through grade 8.

Rebbetzin commiserated with me and then proudly told me that her son Chaim, did not have this problem. He lived in Israel and sent his children to an Israeli Charedi nationalist school, Ahavat Yisrael-Rapaport... or Rapaort for short.They include a secular studies program modeled on the typical Charedi schools in America.

This brings me to a particularly disturbing article in the Israeli Yated Ne’eman . It was republished on their unofficial website Deiah V’Dibur and picked up on Matzav.com. Rapaport is in the process of trying to re-locate from Talpiot to Ramot. Ramot is a Charedi section of Jerusalem.

The residents of Ramot will not have any of that. Posters have been put up all over the place there condemning the entire enterprise. And they cite condemnation by their Gedolim calling such a school Shatnez - the biblically forbidden material woven of linen and wool.

I have written about this attitude many times asking the question about how it is possible that this piece of ‘fabric’ can be Shatnez in one place (Israel) and non-Shatnez in another(America).

But the negative descriptions of this school are so bad it almost sounds like they were talking about eating Treif or violating Shabbos …or worse! Is this how they see Limudei Chol? Here are some of the descriptions of Rapaport in the article:

‘…local rabbonim (are) urging the public to step up the battle against the dangerous new breach…’

‘…a struggle to stave off the effort to import the foreign, unsuccessful form of education…’

‘(The)aim of moving the school is to introduce new educational models to the chareidi community, inculcate foreign values in the children…’

And then there is a letter attached supposedly signed by some of the biggest Charedi names in Israel starting with 100 year old R’ Elyashiv. Here are some excerpts from that letter:

Now “a spiritual threat hangs over the neighborhood due to the municipality’s intentions to house, in one of the neighborhood’s buildings, the “chareidi nationalist” institution, Ahavat Yisrael-Rapaport, with its emphasis on [secular] studies, which runs counter to the spirit of the age-old form of education handed down to us through our rabbonim…

“And therefore, upon seeing the holiness under the threat of destruction, we hereby issue a holy call not to lend a hand in this matter, chas vesholom, and every individual has an obligation to strongly voice opposition to this before all of the entities involved in the matter.

“Activists and public representatives must stand up to this breach, waging a holy war for pure education, and parents are warned in accordance with the Torah not to enroll their children at these institutions.

The letter also speaks in strong opposition to the preparation this school has for army service. But the bulk of the concern seems to be about Limudei Chol.

So there you have it, Lakewood’s premiere high school in Philadelphia is Shatnez. Telshe in Cleveland, Chicago, and Riverdale are spiritual threats of destruction. These kinds of schools are to be opposed in a holy war and parents are warned not to enroll their children there.

One might say that America is different. That this statement was meant for Israel and not the United States. I beg to differ. Even if one accepts the idea of ‘two Torahs’ - nowhere does that statement make such a distinction. The letter and the rhetoric in the article was very clear. Schools that offer Limudei Chol are Shatnez.

One might try and explain that Jerusalem is different. That there is a standing ban against Limudei Chol in Jerusalem going back many generations. The Gedolim who wrote this letter had that in mind.

Again, I beg to differ. No where do they make that distinction. But even if that is the case - there is such a thing as Hora’as Shah. There comes a time where innovation must be introduced to save Judaism itself. This is clearly one of those times.

The raging poverty among Avreichim in Israel which I was made even more acutely aware of on my recent trip has no apparent solution. It is getting worse by the day. Yeshivas Mir has not been able to pay some of its staff their wages since Shavuos. Its Rosh HaYeshiva, R’ Nosson Tzvi Finkel is spending the entire month of Elul trying to raise funds in Europe and the US. This after just Yeshivas Mir’s annual fundraising drive. He is going back to the same people who just gave what they could and asking for substantial amounts more. This is not the time to oppose Yeshivos that offer Limudei Chol.

What about the age old ban against Limudei Chol in Jerusalem? Consider the case of R’ Yosef Chaim Sonnenfeld. R’ Sonnenfeld was the head of the Yishuv HaYashn in Jerusalem in the early 20th century. This was the community that pre-dates Zionism and goes back to the Talmidei HaGra and the followers of the Bal Shem Tov. They immigrated to Israel – mostly Jerusalem - and lived in poverty for many generations just to have the Zechus – merit – of living in the holy land. They abided by the ban against secular studies in Jerusalem and were supported mostly by donations from the West.

When the early Zionists made their mass immigration they started setting up good secular schools in and around Jerusalem. Some of the religious Jews in the Yishuv started sending their children there in the hopes that they would be able to get better jobs through better education.

R’ Sonnenfeld saw attendance at a secular Zionist school as a spiritual threat and collaborated with a religious Bal Habos who was a PhD in education (if I recall correctly). They established religious schools with a curriculum that included Limudei Chol in Jerusalem in order to counteract the pull of the secular Zionist schools.

Imagine that! R’ Sonnenfeld is the spiritual father of Neturei Karta. At least that is what they claim. And yet there was R’ Sonnenfeld advocating religious schools in Jerusalem that included a good secular studies program.

Just like R’ Sonnenfeld saw the need in his time, so too should the current leadership have such a vision – albeit for entirely different reasons. Instead we get an almost vitriolic attack! Oh how times have changed.

Yes, we need Gedolim today. But not like those who signed that letter - if indeed they did. Instead we need Gedolim like Rav Ahron Soloveichik in whose footsteps his son R’ Chaim has followed.

Who Comes Off Like the Fool?

Guest Post by Rabbi Yitzchok Adlerstein

One of the brightest lights on the internet is Rabbi Yitzchok Adlerstein. Among his many duties and contributions to Klal Yisroel - he is a regular contributor to Cross Currents.

Rabbi Adlerstein is an articulate spokesman for mainstream Orthodox Jewish thought. I find myself agreeing with what he writes the vast majority of the time.

I am therefore honored to present a guest post on the subject of Charedim and Rabbi David Orlofsky.

It would be a terrible mistake to paint the entire charedi world in R. Orlofsky colors. I can assure you that there are plenty of charedim here, and even in Israel , who find his remarks repugnant and despicable. People should not be guilty of unthinking small-mindedness in assuming what an entire group must be thinking. They are not all thinking alike. I happen to value both Rabbi Weinreb and Modern Orthodoxy. But friends who don’t so much will still be appalled at the chilul Hashem involved in making Torah Jews look like a bunch of buffoons.

The irony is that to anyone not young and impressionable will listen to the clips and see the wisdom of Chazal: kol haposel be-mumo posel. Who comes off like the fool? Do any of R. Orlofsky’s arguments appeal to reason? Does Torah Yiddishkeit come to a halt if you believe that gedolim are sometimes manipulated? I know very few people who don’t believe it – and they are card-carrying charedim with credentials that put R. Orlofsky’s to shame!

They do not reject those gedolim, but find ways around the manipulators. (I.e. they will only ask important questions when they have out manipulated the manipulators by engineering that the latter should be absent when they ask their questions.) Will a group collapse if it had its own gedolim, and not R. Orlofsky’s (who, for the record, for the most part are among those I value as our gedolei Torah)? And R. Orlofsky can believe what he wants, but there are also thousands of bnei Torah whose chinuch included (well before R. Slifkin published his works) a comfort level with a huge group of rishonim and others who took a different view towards science, the age of the earth, etc. than he would want us to believe is the only legitimate approach.

When Rabbi Weinreb (to whose ankles in Torah R. Orlofsky will never rise) asked Manny Nissel for a gemara with which to address the issue he was working on, would any semi-intelligent adult take it the way R. Orlofsky did, or assume that R Weinreb wanted to hear if R. Moshe Shapiro, shlit”a (R Nissel’s rebbi) had a particularly good, sharp vort with which to illustrate the point. He certainly was not asking out of ignorance if there was a gemara on the topic.

There are several layers of tragedy here. One is that the pressure to conform in parts of the charedi community is so intense, that Americans who make aliyah grovel for acceptance. Some of them find it by disowning their American flavor, including what they learned from American gedolim like Rav Moshe and R Yaakov. If they then succeed in become talmidei chachamim, they can win some measure of acceptance, while continuing to demonstrate how “mainstream” they have become.

Those who are not talmidei chachamim try to win their acceptability by becoming self-appointed defenders of the gedolim and public speakers. (Some very special people avoid the conformity steamroller, and preserve their integrity. Their institutions are the ones that parents ought to be seeking out for their kids.) It is this same oppressive conformity in thought, dress, and action that is largely responsible for the thousands of off-the-derech kids that are falling off the wagon at higher rates from the closed charedi communities than the open ones.

The other layer of tragedy is the harm that will come to the institutions with which Orlofsky and others like him are associated. I reject what others here have written. Ohr Somayach may have changed, but it continues to do very fine work – including with new baalei teshuva. So do Ohr LaGolah, Darchei Binah, and the Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation. But those institutions are now in a bind. They can keep an otherwise effective and popular teacher and presenter, and suffer incalculable harm by association. Or they can part ways, and regain the position of respect they deserve. I wish them all hatzlachah.

Moderation Resumes

Looks like I have to resume moderation.

Some of the comments border on flaming and will certainly evolve into the kind of name calling, insults, and invective that is counter productive. Most commeters have been very co-operative and the discussion flowed very nicely. I just want to express my appreciation for that. But I detect that one or two commenters are determined to break the commenting rules without any regard for others. In some cases the comments were so vile I had to delete them post facto. Others are borderline. Either way - I have no choice but to resume full moderation.

A new post will be up later today.

In Transit

I am currenty in transit from Israel to Chicago. New post tommorrow.

An Insulting Chilul HaShem

There are some very talented and charismatic people involved in Kiruv and yet they do not belong there. Rabbi David Orlovsky (pictured) is one of those people. I have been told by many that he is quite a dynamic personality and speaker and that he has a rather large following. But in my view he should resign his position at Ohr Somayach, the renowned Kiruv Institution in Jerusalem.

I have my issues with Ohr Somayach. They tend to hide just how right wing they are. This is a deceptive tactic in my view bordering on Geneivas Daas. But they do have many successes under their belt. So I would not necessarily support shutting them down nor boycotting them in any way.

It isn’t that I oppose a Kiruv organization that preaches a right wing Hashkafa. I am perfectly fine with it as long as they identify themselves that way. I do not believe that Ohr Somayach does so however. They present themselves as the only authentic form of Orthodoxy. And in doing so they denigrate modern Orthodoxy.

Rabbi Orlovsky seems to thrive in that environment. Apparently they give him license to teach in a hateful style. There are two audio clips that have been recorded of Rabbi Orlofsky’s vile and disgusting drivel. He presents those views as Torah true. They are available at Failed Messiah. Listening to it made me ill!

This fellow preaches to venom, hate, and ridicule to impressionable young Jews who come to Ohr Somayach to learn about their heritage. But teachers like Rabbi Orlovsky do not teach Heritage. He teaches hate. He derides and denigtrates any opposition if it comes from a modern Orthtodox perspective. In doing so he manages to delegitimize the beliefs of tens of thousands of Orthodox Jews. Religious figure that dare to disagree with his strident positions are called names and denigrated in horrible terms.

I would call his Hashkafos Gedolim or Bust! He bows down to them as though they were themselves deities. Never mind any questions about what may have been said in their name. Or suspicians that there has been mainipulation.

He ridicules that - and considers it the height of disrespect to even consider the possiblity that an elderly Gadol can be manipulated. Even though the Gadol he venerates the most admitted that he was manipulated (as per Rabbi Nosson Kaminetsky’s testimony).

No way! Gedlolim cannot be manipulated. What a Chatzpah to even suggest it! Doing so takes one outside the pale! - deserving to be pounded with Rabbi Orlovsky’s verbal fists!

That is apparently what gave him license to bash Rabbi Weinreb who dared to defend a Rabbi Natan Slifkin -a man whose books were labeled heresy by a Gadol who was told what was in them. He could not read them himself since he does not read English.

Rabbi Orlovsky can believe what he wants. If he wants to believe the moon is made out of green cheese, that is his right. What he cannot do is call Rabbi Weinreb insulting names. Especially to a class full of impressionable young people trying to find out the truth about Judaism.

Saying what he did in a classroom has a multiplier effect. These students will surely repeat what they heard - fully believing that it is a Mitzvah to do so. After all their Rebbe was very loud and very clear about Rabbi Weinreb. Obviously he wants the word to be spread. Well, it’s all over the internet now.

There is no excuse for what Rabbi Orlovsky said. Not in any context. He probably thought he was being funny in making his point about. His class seemed to think so. One can hear derisive laughter in the backround.

I have no respect for Rabbi Orlovsky. None!

He is invited to speak all over the world – if I understand correctly. But he should not be rewarded for this Chilul HaShem! He should instead be relieved of his position at Ohr Somayach - if he doesn’t resign - and boycotted wherever he speaks.

Furthermore, any apology forthcoming should be handled with skepticsm in my view. I do not believe it will be sincere. His sincerity has already been expressed. We know what he really thinks.

What a Disgrace!

The man has no shame apparently. According to a news report Rabbi Marc Sheneir has been caught cheating on his fourth wife. Apparently there is photo evidence of him kissing and embracing another woman in the New York Daily News.

It’s hard to understand how a man who dedicates his life to God and serving the community can succumb so easily to temptation. But apparently he has. I do not judge him. I have no idea what his personal circumstances’ are. But one does not have to be a rocket scientist to realize that this is a man of weak character in a job that demands a strong character.

Rabbis are often put into circumstances that present temptation. That requires men of strong character to fight it off. The Gemarah tells us ‘Ain Apitorpus L’Arayos’. No one is immune to temptations of the flesh. Rabbis no less than anyone else. The difference is that as a rabbi you have a responsibility to the community to do whatever it takes to avoid temptations. And Rabbis get plenty of opportunity. That's why laws of Yichud are so important.

They are seen as attractive by their very nature. Men in positions of power often are sought out for attention by female admirers. Power is a very strong aphrodisiac. This makes rabbis particularly vulnerable to temptation. Most rabbis gird themselves for encounters that may lead to an affair. But unfortunately there are some who don’t. They are weak and when opportunity arises – as it frequently does, they succumb all too easily.

It doesn’t matter what segment of Orthodoxy they come from. Apparently Rabbi Sheneir is from the left wing of modern Orthodoxy. But stories abound of all manner of indiscretion from rabbis of all manner of Hashkafos.

I recall one instance where a very prominent rabbi was accused of hitting on a female client he was counseling while he was alone with her in his office. I don’t know if that case was ever resolved. And how many times have I heard stories about a certain Rosh HaYeshiva that actually committed adultery (of the Yehoreg v’Al Yaavor kind)! And then there are the numerous stories of sex abuse by rabbis in positions of power as pulpit rabbis or as teachers.

Rabbi Shcneir is not a sex abuser. But he is not suitable to be a communal rabbi either. He is apparently a man of weak character.

He has been divorced many times according to the article. I would just insert the following caveat. I do not judge a person by how many times he or she was divorced. There could be legitimate reasons in each case. But there is absolutely no excuse for cheating on your wife with another woman. It hurts your wife and children; parents and extended family. In the end it hurts and embarrasses every Torah Jew. It is a Chilul HaShem!

What a shame. This fellow could have been a real role model for tolerance among people of differing religions including Islam. If I remember correctly that was one of his goals and he has apparently worked very hard in trying to achieve it.

What he has instead achieved is embarrassing himself his family and his people- making a mockery of Judaism rather than honoring it!

At this point the least he can do is resign from his Shul and never take another pulpit. What Orthodoxy needs now more than ever is strong leaders. Not weak ones.

An Illustrative Anecdote

There is an interview with Rabbi Aaron Rakeffet-Rothkopf in a recent Jewish Press that was republished at Matzav.com this morning. It reinforces the fact that he is one of my heroes. I truly believe that his Hashkafos are the Emes L’Amito – the deep truth of Torah Judaism.

I have been a fan of his ever since I read his biographies of HaRav Dov (Bernard) Revel, the founding president of Yeshiva College and that of HaRav Eliezer Silver, a unique American Gadol with few peers. Both books were very inspiring and told a story of what greatness in Torah should really be. But my admiration has increased many times over after reading transcripts of some of his Hashkafa Shiurim.

One of the things I found fascinating in that interview is an anecdote he mentioned about Rav Joseph B. Soloveitchik – one of the Gedolei HaDor of the last generation. The Rav was Rabbi Rakeffet’s Rebbe for four years and he remained very close with him afterward.

His description of the Rav’s behavior is counter intuitive of what a Gadol’s behavior should be like. That is because in the most populous portion of Orthodox Jewry – the right wing of the Yeshiva world - we have had a sea change in Hashkafic attitudes about American culture. Painting all of it as negative.

The following really brings home the message of what our attitude should be.

The Rav used to come in from Boston Tuesday morning, said shiur at 1:00 in the afternoon, and then again at 10:00 Wednesday morning. One year he couldn’t come in Tuesday because of a wedding in Boston, so he came in Wednesday. After he finished shiur on Wednesday, he looked at his watch and said, “Tomorrow, we’ll say the shiur at 9:00, will you be here?” I said, “Rebbe, we’ll be there, but why so early?”

So the Rav looked at me: “Arnold, don’t you understand? Tomorrow’s Thanksgiving. We have Thanksgiving dinner with my sister, and I promised my wife we’ll be there at 2:00. So I have to catch the 12:00 plane.”

The Rav was not born in America. He already had his PhD before he immigrated. And yet he felt not only that one may celebrate Thanksgiving at a family meal, he made sure he would attend it himself – altering the Yeshiva’s Shiur schedule to do so!

Can anyone imagine a Gadol doing this today?! The attitude today is more like the following: Thanksgiving? Feh! It’s a Goyishe holiday and has nothing to do with us! How dare any true Ben Torah even mention the holiday?!

It’s true that Rav Moshe Feinstein has a different attitude than the Rav. Although he permitted Thanksgiving Day festive meals with ones family he nevertheless called the practice a Mihag Garua – a bad custom (for Jews).

It’s not that I don’t respect Rav Moshe’s attitude. I do. Elu V’Elu.

But it’s that Rav Moshe’s negative attitude has been not only adopted by the right wing it has been surpassed and extended into derision of all practices that celebrate America. This contributes to the kind of thinking that allows certain people to take liberties with the law in financial matters.

When one is indoctrinated to deride anything American - how can they develop a healthy respect for the law of the land?

The ‘logic’ goes something like this:

America equals Goyishe values. Goyishe values are all bad. Why bother treating Goyim like human beings? And why not take advantage of the system even illegally?! Like cheating the government via tax fraud or the like - if one can get away with it!

Is this the only reason people will commit fraud? No there are many other factors that go into it. But it doesn’t help matters when Mechanchim harangue against things American at every opportunity.

In light of the avalanche of Chilul HaShems with respect to financial fraud by so many ‘ religious’ Jews - I definitely think this relatively recent attack against American culture by Charedi Mechanchim is a key factor that contributes mightily to the cause of the problem.

Without a 180 degree change in attitude I’m afraid that the Mussar currently being given by the right wing rabbinic leaders - eschewing jealousy and greed in an attempt to stem the tide of this behavior - will hardly make a dent in stemming it. Sad to say that as a result - we can expect much more of the same in the future.

The Next Gadol?

There is a famous quote from Rav Eliyahu E. Dessler (based on a Gemarah I believe) that goes something like this:

We need to throw 1000 people into the Beis HaMedrash to get one Gadol. What about the 999 students that do not become Gedolim? Could they not have done better with their lives doing something more suitable to their overall talents? Yes, but we need Gedolim. So even if 999 students ‘fall through the cracks’ it’s worth the price!

I have always taken issue with this philosophy. I do agree that we need people that are highly qualified to issue innovative Halachic Psak and guide our Hashkafos. But I do not think that Rav Dessler’s approach is the only way to get them. In fact I’m not even sure that is the best way. Having 999 out of a 1000 students ‘fall through the cracks’ is never a good idea in my mind.

Nonetheless Rav Dessler’s philosophy seems to have taken hold. It is in part the guiding principle of today’s Charedi Yeshivos and Kollelim. Today’s Charedi Yeshiva student has no other options presented to them other than continuing to learn Torah full time – well into his marriage - for as long as possible. The sacrifice must be made.

Let us examine what we have to show for all that. We do have a lot of very high caliber Torah learning in the world today. There are many Lamdanim and many of them have become lower level Poskim, Roshei Yeshiva, and all forms of Klei Kodesh (people whose careers are in Torah based endeavors). The numbers today are staggeringly high - exponentially greater than at any time in history. But how many of them actually qualify as Gedolim?

I don’t know the answer to that but there is not one name that I have heard of that has risen to the top – as per Rav Dessler.

On the other hand if one looks at the previous generation of Gedolim many names come to mind immediately. Just to mention a few: Rav Solovietchik and his brother Rav Ahron, Rav Aharon Kotler, Rav Moshe Feinstein, Rav Yaakov Kaminetsky… there are so many – far too numerous to mention. Each a legitimate Gadol in his own right.

Who is even close to becoming the next Rav Moshe? Is he among the current crop of Charedi Yeshivaleit and Avreichim? Perhaps. But perhaps not.

A name has surfaced that may have this potential: Moshe Raziel Sharify (pictured). Moshe is a 14 year old boy who may very well become the next ‘certifiable’ Gadol.

The irony is that this young man did not follow the Desslerian track. Nor is he even from a Charedi home. His parents are in fact college educated with advaced degrees. From the Jerusalem Post:

‘Sharify’s father, Nisan Sharify, … has a doctorate in law from Bar-Ilan University and practices taxation law…’ ‘The young man’s mother, Ronit, …has a doctorate in political science from Bar-Ilan University…’

Young Moshe is a genius who has a desire to learn Torah. At 14 he apparently even has a temperament and emotional maturity way beyond his years. This is a ‘magical’ combination and he has a strong start towards becoming a Gadol. He is so brilliant that he has just taken the Rabbanut exam for Rabbinic ordination and passed it with flying colors. This exam is known to be one of the most difficult of its kind. Many people have attempted to get a Rabbanut Semicha and failed. But this young man aced it! (He has not been granted Semicha - which is the subject of the article but it is not the subject of this essay.)

His brilliance was attested to before that:

The chief rabbi of Safed, Shmuel Eliyahu, wrote on July 21, in a certificate of approbation: “I hereby confirm that I tested the student Moshe Sharify at length and in great depth on the topic of the Laws of Shabbat and he answered all my questions correctly and precisely, quoting each law and its source from the Talmud until the very last one… May he continue to persevere with his learning and to grow in the Torah, good attributes and fear of heaven, and to become an adjudicator among the People of Israel.”

Now it’s quite possible that there are Charedi versions of young Moshe. But there are none that have ever taken the Rabbanut exams and few if any that have had written testimony about their brilliance at age 14 from a rabbinic leader in Israel.

Will Moshe become the next Gadol? I don’t know. Only time will tell. But it wouldn’t surprise me.

This illustrates my view that becoming a Gadol is not done in a cookie cutter fashion. Joining the crowd of 1000 in the Beis Hamedrash seems to have not thus far produced the hoped for results that Rav Dessler spoke of.

But it has produced a lot of ‘dropouts’ in Rav Dessler’s sense – people who are fine Lamdanim and perhaps even Talmidei Chachamim but have not developed into Gedolim. In the process they have ignored many of their other God given individual skills and talents. And they have not been properly prepared for making a decent living. Many of them are poverty stricken and cannot put food on the table without increasingly borrowing money from free loan funds.

The previous generation of Gedolim came from a much smaller pool of Bnei Torah (Yeshivaleit and Avreichim) and yet they managed to become Gedolim in far greater number than we have today.

Becoming a Gadol requires a certain type of aptitude; and a unique set of skills and abilities that few people have. Those that have them - will become Gedolim regardless of their Hashkafic environment - or the number of peers they have in their Beis HaMedrash.

Young Moshe Nisan Sharify and the previous generations of Gedolim have proven that one does not need to ‘throw’ 60,000 Yeshvaleit and Yungeleit (the estimated number in Israel today) into the Beis Hamedrash to get one Gadol. I’m not even sure Rav Dessler means to sacrifice 60,000 to get one Gadol. In my view we don’t even need to sacrifice 999. Or even 9!

What we need instead is an application of Chanoch L’Naar Al Pi Darko’. Every human being has his or her innate abilities and talents. It should be readily discernible who has the ‘Gadlus gene’ early in one’s educational career. Any educator worth his salt should be able to see that. Ceratinly that has been the case with young Moshe Nissan Sharify.

What about late bloomers? They too can find themselves given the freedom to pursue their interests. You can’t force Gadlus via a formula. Certainly negating innate talent is not called for. And yet that seems to be what the current Yeshiva system is all about.

Mehadrin Food?! - Lose the Beard and Kipa Instead!

And yet another Chilul HaShem. We've gone from yesterday’s financial Chilul HaShem to this little item in the news. From the New York Post:

It's unholy.

A rabbi convicted of sexually abusing a teenage boy has his kosher meals picked up from a Queens store by an on-duty jail captain.

Baruch Lebovits, a once-respected Satmar rabbi from Brooklyn, gets the special food brought straight to his Rikers Island cell, even though the jail already provides kosher dishes for its Jewish prisoners.

Apparently, they aren't blessed enough for Lebovits, 59, who has been moaning for months that he couldn't eat the food because it hadn't had proper rabbinical supervision, sources said.

Lebovits' adherence to holy law apparently didn't preclude repeatedly sexually abusing a 16-year-old classmate of his son, a heinous crime for which he was sentenced in March to up to 32 years in prison.

This guy makes Weinstein look like a saint. And yet he gets this kind of preferential treatment. I don’t know who this on duty jail captain is – but frankly I don’t get it. What is he doing? Does he think this is some deserving Jew because he looks so ‘holy’ in that long beard and big black velvet Yarmulke? Why does this sick monster get preferential treatment? What is he thinking? I’d sooner feed worms to a fish!

But there is a greater issue here. There are those who might say that prisoners have religious rights and that they should be honored. Furthermore, why should a religious Jew be made to violate his religion if he can be accommodated without undue expense to the government? Child molestation aside - is he still not required to follow Halacha? Of course he is. But no one asks him to violate Halacha. Besides - prison is by definition a denial of rights as a form of punishment.

But his rights aren’t even being violated. That this fellow doesn’t trust a Hechsher is his problem. If he boycotts the food, that’s his problem too.

I am not God’s accountant. Only He knows what is in store for this child molester. But I do not envy his Olam Haba. If he thinks that his ‘Mesiras Nefesh’ is getting him any points with God - he’s probably got another think coming. If anything this 'Mesiras Nefesh' causes an even bigger Chilul HaShem!

If this guy has even an ounce of human dignity left in his bones he ought to shave his beard and stop wearing a Yarmulke. I’m sure he can get a ‘Heter’ for that.

Philanthropic Criminals

The need is so great. Avrechim in Israel are not making ends meet. Unless they are from very wealthy families most people seem to be borrowing money from the Gemachim (free loan funds) just to buy food.

I’m told that the Rosh HaYeshiva of the Mir is in Europe trying to raise money and is having a terrible time raising any. I am also told that he is going to spend the entire month of Elul doing so in the United States.

There are unpaid Avreichim and staff in the Mir currently going back to around Shavuos. I have also been told that the government stipends to Yeshivos have been cut back even further. It is not a pretty picture.

Part of the solution to the problem would be ‘thinning out the herd’ by not accepting every applicant. I think newer and tougher standards of admittance ought to be implemented. And those Avreichim that are there now ought to be tested against th0se standards increasing them every year they are there. If they do not measure up, they ought to be given notice and told they will no longer be supported at any financial level. Unfortunately that is about as likely to happen as Hamas erecting a statue of Meir Kahane in Gaza.

In the meantime I do not think starving them out of Kollel thus forcing Avreichim to find whatever work they can - is the way to solve that problem. That would be cruel and unusual punishment to people brought up on the philosophy of ‘Kollel of bust’! Ultimately that may happen anyway. But for now, the situation is pretty dire.

I can’t imagine what it must be like for the majority of families who lead the Kollel life in Israel. It is therefore understandable that all sources of funding are considered by Yeshiva leadership.

But should they be? Even in such dire financial circumstances? Clearly the answer is no, they shouldn’t. There are few things worse in the Torah world than starving families of Avreichim who dedicate their lives to Torah learning. But one of them is taking tainted money.

I do not accuse the major Yeshivos of doing that. I am certain for example that Mir Rosh HaYeshiva, Rav NossonTzvi Finkel would never knowingly accept a dime from a questionable source. But there are some Yeshivos that not only accept money from questionable sources – they actually honor the donors. That is unfortunately is a Chilul HaShem in my view.

Which brings me to Eliyahu Weinstein an apparently religious Jew in Lakewood. From a story in Ausbury Park Press (APP.com-republished at VIN):

Shackled in handcuffs and leg irons, Eliyahu Weinstein, the Lakewood real estate developer charged Thursday by federal agents with having "masterminded" a $200 million scheme to defraud his investors, listened in federal court as an assistant U.S. attorney detailed charges that could net him more than 50 years in prison.

Unfortunately once again we have the sight of a religious Jew doing the ‘perp walk’. $200 million may not be 50 billion. That was the estimated amount of Bernie Madoff’s con. But it ain’t beanbag either.

I don’t know anything about this fellow other than what has been presented in the media. But the frequency with which these kinds of stories seem to be appearing just adds fuel to the fire of anti-Semitism. If I were a non Jew I might be thinking, ‘I guess it’s true what they say about the Jews.’ ‘They are just a bunch of greedy slimeballs who can spot a sucker every minute and take him for all he’s worth!’

Thank God the American people are generally not like that. Most decent Americans do not buy that negative Jewish stereotype. They judge each individual based on their own merit and not those of a fellow coreligionist who happens to be a criminal. But that does little for my comfort level as a religious Jew living among fellow decent and law abiding Americans. I become more embarrassed each time something like this hits the major media. The question is -do those Yeshivos who often honor people like this feel that way.

I don’t know whether or not Mr. Weinstein has even been honored for major contributions to Yeshivos or even whether he has ever donated substantial money to any of them. If he has – and if the allegations are proven true – I would return all the money he ever gave. And yet in the current economic climate that would seem to be a near impossibility! After all that money has probably long ago been distributed.

How does one go to an Avreich who cannot even afford to feed his family and say that much of the money he has in the past received was tainted and he ought to return it?! And yet not doing constitutes a Chilul HaShem, does it not? How can any decent Avreich take any money from someone who stole it from innocent people to the tune of $200 million?

One also wonders how many other Frum philanthropists are crooks like this? Are religious institutions built on this financial house of cards?

What a mess!

Successful Marriages

An article published in last week’s Aish.com intrigued me. The title or the article is: Do more intelligent women have a harder time getting married? The article went on to give some great advice about dating people with intelligence disparities.

Should intelligence disparities be a factor when setting people up? I think it should. But as the article suggests two people do not have to have equal IQs in order to click. There are so many factors that goes into choosing one’s life partner that it can intimidate people right out of considering marriage at all.

My wife and I have unfortunately been unsuccessful at making any Shiduchim. Not for a lack of trying. It’s just that they never seem to work out. Far be it from me to try and talk two people into continuing a relationship. But sometimes I wonder if we do not give up too easily. And just how much compatibility is needed? What are the basics that will enable a relationship to flower into a successful marriage?

I can’t really answer that question. But I thought I might put together a list of items that I feel are basic requirements for a successful marriage.

Not that it is impossible to have a wonderful life together when two people do not have that much in common. I know of plenty of successful marriages where people will say about them, ‘Who put them together – they’re so different!’ But I think that is more the exception than the rule. And it’s also very likely that there are compatibilities between them that are not apparent to the naked eye.

Which characteristics are important? I can only answer in my own biased way. What is important to me may not be important to others. Off the top of my head - here is my list.

Values. I believe this is the single most important factor in successful marriages. If a couple does not share the same basic values - the marriage is doomed from the start. Everything else is of little consequence in relationship to that. This does not mean there can’t be differences. Indeed it is almost impossible to meet someone whose values are identical to your own. But the core values have to be the same. Other value differences need to be the same but ought to be respected. They need not impede a good future for this couple.

Maturity. If it isn’t a core value than compromise will prevail - with give and take on both sides. That takes a certain degree of maturity. And that is a very important factor too. Letting your spouse win a non core value dispute will go a long way toward enhancing the marital relationship.

Religious observance. The level of religious observance should be more or less the same. And there should be willingness to compromise in either direction by both sides – as long as a leniency doesn’t violate Halacha and a stringency doesn’t cause undue hardship.

Hashkafos. These are important too. But there is a bit more latitude here. For example I don’t think there is anything wrong with a right wing modern Orthodox male dating a moderate Charedi female – or vice versa. At the same time I would not put a left wing modern Orthodox male with a very Charedi female.

Raisning children. The philosophy of raising children is an important factor too. A couple should have a more or less common approach to raising them. Such as what kind of disciplinary measures to use. There should also be a common approach to educating children with more or less common goals for them. If for example one parent wants their son to be a Charedi Gadol and the other would like him to be a university educated professional, there are going to be big problems. Of course this relates to Hashkafos too.

Personality. It is always a good idea to have similar personalities. They need not be identical but they ought to be ‘ballpark’. I would not for example put together a cheapskate with a spendthrift.

On the other hand I have seen many couples where one is somewhat introverted and the other is a bit more extroverted. As long as there is room for compromise that shouldn’t be too much of a problem. On the other hand if one is so shy that they shun all social contact and the other is a people person, that could cause huge problems.

Physical attraction. This is a very important factor and in no way should be over-looked. If one is not attracted to a potential mate, the relationship should end there. There has to be at least some physical attraction for any marriage to succeed.

Intelligence. As noted above intelligence should not be a factor if the differences are not to great. I would generally not put a genius together with person who has a below average IQ. But as long as there can be intelligent conversation between the two, it should not be a problem. It’s probably never a good idea to measure even one’s own IQ anyway. What’s the point?

Knowledge. This is a tricky one. And I may come off as sexist here – although I don’t mean to be. If a woman knows substantially more than the man she is dating that it will embarrass him. I would not put them together. On the other hand the reverse is not necessarily true – to a point. For some reason which I admit is not entirely fair, society is more accepting of a man knowing more than his wife than it is of a woman knowing more than her husband. And societal attitudes do impact on the way people behave.

Not that the knowledge has to be equal. That is a virtual impossibility anyway. Not that a man cannot marry a woman who is a bit more knowledgeable than he is. But if the disparity is too great the marriage will never work in my view. The reverse however is not as true. A man can be significantly more knowledgeable than his wife and they will both feel fine with it. But if the disparity is too great it will not work either.

Shared interests. If the areas of interest are radically different, there can be no real relationship. How can there be? There will never be any shared time together. One must be able to be friends with one’s spouse and that can only happen when there are shared interests.

There are some exceptions to this I think. If a man is very knowledgeable in one area to the exclusion of his wife and his wife is knowledgeable in another area to the exclusion of her husband -that can work fine. It is all about feelings of inferiority. As long as neither spouse feels inferior to the other such knowledge of disparate subjects can even be a plus.

These are some of my random thoughts. I’m sure there are many exceptions. I’m absolutely certain I missed out on a few important components that will make for a successful marriage. And I’m equally sure I missed out on a few points that can sabotage a marriage. But I hope the ones I did point out make sense.