The question arises as to what those images are. Are they
the same for all people? Is it the same for men as for women? Do individual differences
come into play?
I don’t think that this is an issue for women. It is a male
problem. And the answer to the question is subjective.
A lot depends on nature and a lot depends on nurture. I happen to believe that the nature of the
human male to respond to erotic visual images is dealt with in Judaism by the
laws of Erva. Anything beyond that is nurture. So in a vacuum when a normal heterosexual
man sees a woman who is dressed immodestly by Torah standards it will elicit
improper thoughts.
On the other hand in those cultures where it is common for
women to dress slightly less modest by Torah standards, such sights do not generally
give way to improper thoughts since men are so used to seeing them that way… as
long as the society in which one lives considers it modest. A woman wearing a sleeveless dress for
example will rarely elicit improper thoughts in most American men.
Unfortunately in our time some women feel very comfortable
wearing the most immodest of clothing by any standard of western civilization.
Especially in the summer time. Although impulses by men who encounter them are
for the most part controlled, most men will definitely notice these women and
improper thoughts may soon follow. This is where Shmiras Enayim comes in. One
should try and avoid staring at improperly dressed women like that. Just as
they should avoid looking at provocative billboard ads like those of Victoria’s
Secret.
But nurture can go the other way. If one rarely sees any
women publicly as is the case in certain Chasidic circles, then even a Halachicly
very modestly dressed women may elicit improper thoughts. This is why many Chasidic
publications do not publish pictures of women no matter how modest their dress
is… even if they are covered from the neck down to the toe in a loose fitting outfit.
In my view – it is the desire to reach that demographic that magazines like
Mishpacha and Ami have decided not to publish any pictures of women even though they world probably agree that
there is nothing wrong with it, Halachicly.
Taking nurture to the extreme - Muslim women who cover
themselves up in Burkas would probably elicit improper thoughts in Muslim men
if they would dare to dress in the more revealing standard of a Meah Shearim
woman.
Bottom line - once you are past the basic requirement to
cover up Erva it’s all about what you’re used to.
How far does a man have to go to avoid seeing a provocatively
dressed woman (or image of a woman)? As always, common sense and self restraint
should prevail. You do the best you can to avoid staring at those images. If
you accidently encounter it, you should simply avert your eyes.
But in certain circles common sense and self restraint has
nothing to do with how one lives. As with many other things it’s all about going
to any extreme to accomplish the goal. Some of which are so ridiculous that it would
make a laughing stock out of us if we were all to adopt them.
There was a letter in Hamodia’s May 16th issue in
the Reader’s Forum that promoted a ‘genius’ of an idea in this regard. This
fellow has had difficulty in airports and in airplanes. I guess seeing female
flight attendants or some of the female passengers have caused him to have impure
thoughts.
His solution? Transparent stickers over your glasses that
will blur everything you look at. And if you don’t wear glasses, buy a pair of glasses
with clear lenses and place the stickers over them. This way you could look
straight at people and have no clue what they really look like. Problem solved.
Does the individual who wrote that letter really think that
no one would realize what we were doing if all of us would start wearing ‘stickies’
on our glasses?
I can see it now. The next Asifa: Shmiras Enayim - Solutions to the Pitfalls of
the Street. Will these stickers be
promoted as one of the solutions? What’s next? Will someone come up with an
even more ridiculous idea that will offer even more protection? Like maybe a
blindfold and a seeing eye dog?
If Hamodia hadn’t published this story, I would have thought
this was some sort of parody. Sadly, it isn’t. The writer was as serious about
it as a heart attack. And Hamodia must have felt the same way since they
published the letter without comment.
