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| Picture of me taken at the Kotel a few years ago |
To put it the way a woman who goes by the name ‘kweansmom’
did it in a comment yesterday:
(Rabbi Barry Freundel) allegedly committed his crime during an especially emotionally vulnerable time for his victims and abused his position of trust as a clergyman. This is very different from a storeowner who places a camera in his dressing room. These circumstances should absolutely be taken into consideration by the court.
I completely agree with her.
What makes his sin even worse and a greater Chilul HaShem
than it might otherwise be is that he was such a respected Orthodox figure in
the modern world. He commanded the respect of not only his coreligionists, but
of the wider public. He besmirched the very Hashkafos that both he and I stand
for. When a prominent Centrist figure like Barry Freundel behaves as he did, it makes my version of
Yiddishkeit look bad. I cannot find it in my heart to have compassion for people in positions of power who do things like that.
But all this is not the purpose of this post. I just wanted
to be clear about my utter contempt for this man.
The purpose of this post is something that saddens me. Which
is the complete misunderstanding of my attitude towards Charedim. Even by some
of those that have similar Hashkafos. Which was made known to me by the
following comment from kweansmom:
I was really hoping you wouldn't (again) try to sweep the wrondoings of a beloved Modern Orthodox rabbi under the rug and call for second chances that you would never afford to an Ultra-Orthodox rabbi in a scandal. Sadly, I am disappointed.
This statement is not true. I did not try to sweep the wrongdoings of a beloved
Modern Orthodox rabbi under the rug. But obviously kweansmom thinks it is true. As do some in the Charedi world that think I am overly
generous to MO rabbinic miscreants while bashing Charedi rabbinic miscreants.
So let me try once again to explain my views; explain why I wrote the original
post; and try to examine why so many people think I am so biased.
First let me state unequivocally that I am not anti Charedi at
all. I completely reject the accusation by anyone that I am. Those Charedim that
understand what I do here (and there are many) already know that. I respect Charedi
Hashkafos in the sense of Elu V’Elu. I only wish Charedim would do the same for my
views (But again – that is off topic).
I have often said
that there is little difference in lifestyle or values between moderate
Charedim (which comprise the majority of all Charedim) and Centrists (RWMO) like
myself. The Hashkafic differences are real. But they do not impact the relationship
we have with each other nor should they. Which is why I believe that mainstream
Orthodoxy of the future will be (and to some extent already is) a homogeneous entity
comprised of these 2 groups - with moderate Charedim in the majority.
I have also expressed many times my admiration for the truly
great Charedi Gedolim. The list is long but includes such luminaries as R’
Yaakov Kaminetsky (a particular hero of mine), R’ Moshe Feinstein, R’ Aharon
Kotler, R’ Yitzchak Hutner, R’Avrohom Pam… and a many others. In light these two specific points I
am always surprised when I get accused of having an anti Charedi pro MO
bias. Especially when it comes from my own Hashkafic peers.
Perhaps it is because so many of my posts deal with Charedi
wrongdoing. But that’s because that is what is out there in the public square. Much of what this blog is about is my reaction to stories reported in the media about Jews and Jewish subjects. Furthermore I have only been critical when there was a massive
Chilul HaShem involved.
That I have suggested that some of that wrongdoing might
have been generated by Charedi Hashkafos taken to an extreme is not the same thing as bashing the Hashkafa
itself. That I have been critical of one or more aspects of that Hashkafa which I
believe might result in something harmful to the fabric of Judaism (e.g. the
Israeli Charedi policy of no secular studies in their high schools) is not a criticism
of the Hashkafa. It is a criticism of what I believe is an extreme position taken
by Israeli Charedim on the subject of studying Limudei Chol. Charedi Hashkafos
are not inherently opposed to Limudei Chol.
I will admit that I have used some… let us say colorful
language in expressing these views in the past. Like using the phrase ‘head in
the sand’ with respect to their insular approach to the outside world. Perhaps
I shouldn’t have used that phrase as it can easily be taken as pejorative. But
it was not intended as such. It is just the way I write – which is done to get
people’s attention. I will try and do better in this regard in the future.
Finally I want to specifically address the issue of seeming
to be kinder and gentler to MO wrongdoers than I am to Charedi wrongdoers. This was
suggested in the above comment made by ‘kweansmom’ as well as others in private e-mails.
I do not believe that I am kinder to MO wrongdoers. I respond to the acts - not Hashkafos. There are differences between crimes. There is a
difference between spying on women in a shower unbeknownst to them - and rape,
sexual abuse, or sexual molestation. You cannot compare voyeurism to forcing a
teenage girl to have sex with you and claiming it is therapy. Or taking
advantage of seminary girls that have a crush on you, end up offering you
sexual favors, and you taking them up on it. There is a difference between
sodomizing young boys as a ‘Frum psychologist’ and watching one get undressed
from afar. There is a difference between a rabbinic Kiruv leader fondling his
young charges and watching them get undressed through a peephole.
Elon, Lanner, Meisels, Weberman, and Mondrowitz, (among far
too many others) are all guilty of direct and unwanted sexual contact of varying degrees which
ruined the lives of their victims. To my knowledge Freundel has not been charged
with anything like that. At least not yet. If on the other hand he is also
guilty of that too, then he is just as condemn-able as those other rabbis.
Those differences are why my post was initially more
sympathetic to Freundel than I have been to the other above-mentioned rabbis. However, as I have already said, I have since come to realize that
my sympathy was misplaced. But to say
that I would never go as easy on a Charedi rabbi as I did on an MO rabbi is
absolutely not true.
Had Mondrowitz for example only been accused of spying on
young children while they were in a state of undress, I would have had the same
sympathy for him that I did for Freundel. I would have said he is sick and needs
therapy. But Mondrowitz turned out to be a monster of major proportions that
deserved a much harsher fate than he has living freely in Israel. Something
along the lines of Mida K’neged Mida…. Or at least as long a prison term as Weberman
got if not longer.
Freundel cannot be compared to Mondrowitz or to any of the
others. So I while I apologize for my compassionate treatment of Freundel
knowing what I know… my misplaced compassion was coming from those differences.
Not from any special treatment toward
Modern Orthodox rabbis.
But as I also said, even that compassion was misplaced. What
Freundel did was a complete abuse of power. He has caused psychological damage
to his victims. He harmed the reputation of his Shul. He has very likely discouraged
Mikvah usage causing some women to fear ‘being watched’ by their rabbi. He embarrassed
Modern Orthodoxy. And he has caused a huge Chilul HaShem.
I hope that makes my position abundantly clear.
