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| YCT Rosh HaYeshiva Rabbi Dov Linzer |
He is joined by Dr. Bat Sheva Marcus, a woman who bills herself as an Orthodox sex therapist. According to the Jewish Week she was profiled in the New York Times about her work with Charedim. I’m not sure there is any difference between what Rabbi Boteach did and what Rabbi Linzer is doing. Other than the fact that Rabbi Linzer’s efforts are free to the public online and available to anyone who wishes to access it.
I have to wonder about the propriety of this. I have my
issues with YCT. And have spelled them out quite clearly in the past. One of
them in fact raises questions about a hard line being crossed. A line with respect to
the tolerance of rabbis in their midst that have cast the the events at Sinai into the realm of fiction.
But leaving all that aside, a new issue has arisen that is
keeping YCT firmly implanted in controversy. The Jewish Week reports about a
new website jointly hosted by YCT and JOFA (Jewish Orthodox Feminist Alliance)
on a program called the Joy of Text… a play on the title of a very popular
book of the 70s entitled the Joy of Sex - an illustrated sex manual by British
author Alex Comfort, PhD. That should give you some idea about the purpose of
this podcast. (Jewish Public Media is a separate organization that produces the The Joy of Text in collaboration with JOFA and YCT.)
It isn’t a program about Taharas Mishpacha - family purity
laws. That would be fine. It is basically a a sex manual for Orthodox Jews. It
features Issues like the permissibility
of sexual fantasies... which kind are permitted and which are forbidden and
whether sex toys are permitted and in what context.
I’m not quite sure what to make of it. On the one hand,
there ought to be more information about these things disseminated to young
people before they get married. My guess is that there is precious little of it
now. I am told by people involved in these things that that these
issues are indeed discussed. But my guess is that they fall woefully short of
touching the entire gamut of issues involved. Knowledge is power. Halachic
knowledge is Halachic power.
So at first blush it
would seem that there is everything right about this. Nothing to criticize. Sex is an
important part of marriage. It ought not be put on the back burner of educating
young men and women about marriage. Understandably, however, most people are
reluctant to talk about it. Including, and perhaps especially those that ought
to be – Mechanchim. Teachers who mold the
character of our young. That makes it
kind of a conundrum. But it shouldn’t be.
My reservation is in the public way it is being done. And
that one of the participants is the Rosh HaYeshiva of YCT. Is
it really appropriate for a Rosh HaYeshiva to be talking publicly about sexual
fantasies and sex toys? Even if his
entire purpose is to provide the Halachic perspective on this?
I’m conflicted about this particular way of tackling
this very sensitive issue. And yet I think there is a need. Perhaps instead
of a podcast it might be more appropriate to encourage people to consult with
rabbinic experts and a therapist privately about these matters.
On the other
hand maybe this is the only way to do it effectively so that it reaches the maximum number of people. Isn’t that better than taking a
chance on doing something that is forbidden? Or not doing something that is
permitted because of preconceived notions that it is forbidden?
Does that outweigh the impropriety of a Rosh HaYeshiva talking about sex toys in public? I don’t know. Rabbi Boteach thought his way was fine. I suppose that Rabbi Linzer thinks that his way is fine too. But I wonder.
Does that outweigh the impropriety of a Rosh HaYeshiva talking about sex toys in public? I don’t know. Rabbi Boteach thought his way was fine. I suppose that Rabbi Linzer thinks that his way is fine too. But I wonder.
