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| Mitzvah Tanz (For illustration purposes only) |
The Chasan ‘ditches’ the Gartel, holds hands with the Kallah while dancing with her. This ends the Mitzvah Tanz. The reason they do this is to fulfil the Mitzvah of making the Kallah joyous. A Mitzvah indicated by the Gemarah (Kesubos (16b – 17a) which asks, ‘ Keitzad M’Rakdin Lifnei HaKalah’ – How does one dance of front of the Kallah?’
This Tanz is a uniquely Chasidic custom. The rest of the Orthodox Jewish world fulfills that Mitzvah during the heart of the wedding itself while everyone is dancing. The Kallah goes over to the men’s side of the Mechtiza, sits together with her Chasan and then relatives and guests dance in front of both of them. This is usually one of the more lively portions of the wedding. I have seen distinguished Roshei Yeshiva ‘go to town’ – dancing exuberantly when the Kallah comes in.
That Chasidim don’t do this is (you guessed it) for reasons of Tznius. They consider it immodest for the Kallah to march over to the men’s side of the Mechitza for any reason. In fact at many Chasidic weddings the Chasan and Kallah do not sit together at all during the wedding meal. Not even for Sheva Brachos at the end of the wedding. Each has their own ‘Dais’ on either side of the Mechitza and sits with their respective parents and grandparents.
Ironically, after the Sheva Brachos when most guests go home, the families and close friends of the Chosson and Kallah congregate. Without a Mechitza. With the Kallah sitting somewhere in the middle as she awaits the Mitzvah Tanz.
That they do it after the wedding might seem contradictory. But if you ever witnessed one of these, you’d know why it isn’t. For one thing, the Kallah doesn’t move at all. She just stands there holding on to one end of the Gartel. This is done over and over again as a Badchan (a Chasidic comedian of sorts) drones on endlessly with a flattering if somewhat humorous bio of each relative before they approach the Kallah.
As a Rosh HaYeshiva of a Lithuanian type Yeshiva (who shall remain nameless) once said in Yiddish, ‘The Mitzvah Tanz is neither a Mitzvah nor a Tanz’. I could not agree more. But as I indicated - If you ever attended one of those, you would know what he meant.
I bring this up as a demonstration of how extreme matters of Tznius are being taken among Chasidim. It also helps to explain why Chasidim are so adamant about not publishing pictures of women - and other assorted erasures of women from the public square.
Although I don’t see any possibility of the Mitzvah Tanz catching on in the Lithuanian Yeshiva world, their obsession with Tznius has. The Lithuanian Yeshiva world keeps looking to the Chasidim and emulating them so as not to be outdone in those matters. Which is why they too no longer publish pictures of women.
The only question is, how far will this obsession go? I shudder think that we may someday see infiltrating the Lithuanian Yeshiva world.- the Tznius dancing extremes of a Chasidic participant at a Mitzvah Tanz recently. It is already happening to some extent. For example it is becoming increasingly common for the Kallah to no longer go over to the men’s side of the Mechitza and sit with her new husband for purposes of ‘Keitzad’. What was once a celebrated part of the wedding is no longer seen as modest enough. This is a self selected censorship of a Mitzvah clearly cited by the Gemarah that until recently was observed with great enthusiasm.
As the Charedi world continues to descend into more extreme behavior I wonder whether the way the Chasid in this tweeted video performs the Mitzvah Tanz will infiltrate the Lithuanian Yeshiva world. Are the extremes reflected by this Chasid’s over the top aversion to looking at the Kallah during his Mitzvah Tanz the wave of the future for the rest of mainstream Orthodoxy? I don’t know. But it sure seems like it.
