The Mind of a Gadol

There is no doubt in my mind about it. If there is any heir to the throne of Gadlus occupied by Rav Joseph B. Soloveitchik it is Rav Aharon Lichtenstein. If one wants to know what - and who - is a Gadol in the 21st century one need go no further than Rav Lichtenstein. I have felt this way for quite some time now. Even though I never met him - the more I hear about him, the more I read his words, the more I am convinced of that.

This feeling came through once again after reading essays from his new book, Varieties of Jewish Experience, published by KTAV.

Not only does his brilliance shine through, not only is his erudition so evident, but his clarity of vision and purpose is manifest in virtually every word he writes. His exposition is reminiscent of the great works of his Rebbe and father in law, the Rav. His level of intellectual honesty is matched only by his quest for Emes. And in seeking it, he plumbs the depths of both Torah and Mada – just as did the Rav.

He leaves no page unturned in his quest. Nor does he concern himself with image or reputation. He is only interested in truth – the truth of Torah. And when he believes he is right he has the courage of his conviction to speak his mind on any subject or issue facing the Jewish people. His erudition is unmatched by anyone in any rabbinic leadership position in our day. Brilliance, Torah, Chesed, and Emes defines this man. As does his humility.

His new book is a compilation of essays published in various forums reflecting – as the title suggests - a variety of Jewish experience.

To say that he has the courage of his convictions is an understatement. How many others who might be considered Gedolim would publish an essay about the act of sex? That is in fact the first essay in the book. It spells out what the prevailing attitude about sex in marriage is and contrasts it with what the Torah, Talmud, Rishonim, and Achronim say.

To me one of the most important essays in the book is the one on Rabbinic authority in our day. In a broad overview about communal governance, both lay and rabbinic he addresses the idea of what has come to be known as Daas Torah. He poses the question about where the authority lies Halachicly in matters of public policy… whether there is any overlap between lay and rabbinic authority and whether rabbinic authority has full veto power on lay authority.

In fact asks Rav Lichtenstein, why grant any authority to laypeople at all? And why grant any to rabbis over questions of communal governance and policy – that proceed from conflicting assumptions and move along diametrically opposite lines?

The point of departure of the first is the presupposition that in a Jewish community, laypeople should have no authority at all and consequently if granted a rationale must be found for it in order to justify it.

Contrarily the latter presumes that in matters of communal governance and policy there ought not be any rabbinic interference at all!

Rav Lichtenstein is uncomfortable with either presupposition. The first seems blatently patronizing and paternalistic. It assumes that Daas Torah is the only way to proceed with respect to both ends and means. No other entity has a say.

Rav Lichtenstein finds this position untenable. Even if we assume that spiritual oligarchs know best, it does not necessarily follow that imposition of their will is advisable. In the public arena, poorer but self determined results may preferable to an ecclesiastically informed and dictated bottom line. There is a moral and religious value in according dignity and responsibility to the laity. Provision of course mst be made to insure Halachic and Hashkafic acceptabilty. This is indeed the province of the rabbis. This is true as well in difficult and sensitive matters not governed specifically by Halacha but is yet may not be fully consonant with its spirit and tone.

Nor is Rav Lichtenstein satisfied with the presupposition of the lay leadership. While matters of public policy where Halacha is not an issue – a Davar HaReshus – He finds the idea of leaving out any rabbinic participation therein unconscionable. It does violence to Halacha and its rabbinic representatives. The notion that whatever has not been explicitly proscribed and therefore none of the rabbis business is an abhorrent one! To put it the way Rav Lichtenstein does:

It obviates sensitivity to lifnim mi-shurat hadin,, in its multifaceted manifestations, obliterates meta-Halakhik considerations, and potentially eviscerates the ethical and axiological components of Torah spiritual life. It invites not only Pauline and Buberian charges of arid legalism but Hazal’s scathing comment, lo harevah Yerushalayim ella al she-danu bah din Torah. It diminishes the image and the reality of the rabbi’s stature, and emasculates his position as the spiritual and pastoral leader of his community.

What is the ideal model for lay leadership? How much of a role should rabbinic wisdom play? What about rabbinic pronouncement and bans? That is all beyond the scope of this essay. You will have to read the book. Needless to say, it is a complicated issue with many sources in Chazal and the Rishonim.

Other topics covered in this book are many of those dealt with right here. I highly recommend it if one wants to see the mind of a Gadol at work.

The loss to Yeshiva University of Rav Lichtenstein’s via his Aliyah to Israel is immeasurable. He should have taken the reigns of leadership there upon his father in law’s passing. It is a leadership that is sorely lacking in this country – a vacuum was created and the void has not been filled.

Rav Soloveitchik had many great Talmidim, who are today Gedolim in their own right. But in my view only one of them comes close to the Rav’s greatness in so many ways. He now lives in Israel and is the Rosh HaYeshiva of Gush Etzion. Their gain is our loss. Had he stayed in Yeshiva University I personally believe he would have continued the legacy of his father in law like no other.

Reconstituting Jewish Brotherhood

I’m not usually in the habit of agreeing with Conservative rabbis. And yet I can’t help agreeing with the sentiments expressed by one of them in an article in the Jerusalem Post.

It is ironic that this perspective comes at a time when Agudah seems to be doing everything in its power to alienate even Orthodox Jews that do not agree with its dogma. Rabbi Daniel Gordis has posed a very interesting question. Noting the ‘sea of black’ comprised of over 100 thousand people who attended the funeral of Rav Nosson Tzvi Finkel, he wonders why there was virtually no secular Jew in attendance.

By contrast if a secular Jew of similarly great stature were to die, there would doubtless be very few if any religious Jews in attendance. He compares this number to a same number of attendees about 100 years ago for the funeral of Y.L. Peretz a famous Yiddish writer. That funeral was attended by all manner of Jews religious and secular.

What happened? Why the current divide, he asks? Recognizing the greatness of Rav Nosson Tzvi he wonders why secular Jews never heard of him. Or if they did, could not care less about his death… or his life. They simply do not know or recognize his achievements. As another Conservative rabbi, Jason Miller, admits in his blog:

I had never read anything he had written or listened to any of his sermons on YouTube. I immediately knew he was a "tzaddik" (righteous man) and a "gadol hador" (an influential giant of his generation) because over 100,000 people attended his funeral. I will be the first to admit that his death didn't affect my life and after reading the headline of his death I said "baruch dayan ha'emet" and went on about my day.
In an interesting sidebar, Rabbi Miller asks if there were any secular Jewish figures of comparable stature that would draw 100 thousand people to a funeral and is hard pressed to come up with any.

But that aside both Rabbis Miller and Gordis make the point that it is not whether we honor someone post mortem, but whether we value their thoughts and deeds when they are alive.

From an Orthodox perspective, I have to admit that we have done a very poor job of both educating the secular Jewish public about our great leaders and conversely great numbers of us - primarily in the Yeshiva world - have done a poor job of recognizing secular Jewish achievement. As Rabbi Gordis points out with Y.L. Peretz it was not always like this.

As I have often said in situations like this, the enemy is us! It is very difficult to sell heterodox Jews on ourselves when we go to great lengths to show how much we reject their theology. I’m not saying that we should now change our attitude and start embracing them as equals. It is still important to reject their theology, as per the views of the greatest rabbinic minds of the 20th century, including Rav Joseph B. Soloveitchik. But at the same time we have to realize that this has been a serious impediment in selling our ideas to them.

Some on the far left of modern Orthodoxy who realize this impediment have - on their own - removed this barrier. They are now very active in dialoguing with them theologically, something Rav Soloveitchik expressly forbade. Their goals are noble in the sense that engaging with them gives us better opportunities to sell our message. But the danger in seeming to endorse their theology is still there. Even if they say publicly that they do not agree with it, the very fact that they engage in theological debate is a form of recognition. Which is why Rav Soloveitchik forbade it.

The question arises, how do we solve this conundrum? How can we get the message across to the rest of the Jewish world about our ‘Rav Nosson Tzvis’? I don’t have any great answers but that is an important question to be asked.

One thing I do know is that we can do a better job of it than we are. Most heterodox Jews do not harbor any innate animosity towards Orthodox Jews. I suspect that to the extent that they do it is because they see us as pushing them away. In our zeal to protect our values we often send messages of rejection. We certainly do not send messages of brotherly love.

For example it is one thing to refuse to participate with heterodox Jews in theological debate. But it is quite another to constantly harp on it. It is also wrong to refuse to have anything at all to do with them – even when it would be for the benefit of the Klal. This is one area where Rav Soloveitchik disagreed with his peers. He advocated engagement for the benefit of the Klal so long as it was not in religious areas.

We cannot leave outreach only to outreach organizations. We all need to do outreach all the time - whether it is one on one, or perhaps more importantly, organizationally. We need to teach by example. This has been very difficult of late because there have been so many examples of Orthodox miscreants. When a religious Jew does a criminal act, that is a ‘man bites dog story’ and it is going to make the news. This will be what secular Jews read about us.

They will not read about the great works of Rav Nosson Tzvi; nor his great character; nor his dedication to his people; nor his dedication to God. When will they hear about him? When he dies and 100 thousand people attend his funeral. And their reaction? At best it will mirror Rabbi Miller’s.

At the same time we need to recognize the contributions of other great Jews… the Nobel Prize winners and other great achievers… contributors to the betterment of mankind. There is a tendency on the part of the right to play down those achievements. To almost disparage them in comparison to the achievements of an Avreich who sits and learns with Hasmadah rabbah – great diligence. This is serious mistake and adds to the negative image of Orthodox Jews.

The impression a secular Jew gets is that we are a bunch of ignorant Jews living in a ghetto preferring to stick our heads in the ground - unaware of - or refusing to recognize the great contributors to mankind. Those who promote this message do a great disservice to Judaism.

No one denies the value of Limud HaTorah. ‘Talmud Torah K’neged Kulam’, the Mishna in Peah tells us. But that does not mean that everything else in the world is meaningless and of no value. And yet that is often the message sent and very well learned in the right wing Yeshiva world. The end result is an increasingly unbridgeable chasm between Jews and Jews.

There needs to be more integration between secular and religious Jews. What form that takes is a matter of debate that should engage the best and brightest minds in the Torah world. The one thing we shoudn’t do is continue to alienate them. That is counter to the Torah’s demand that Kol Yisroel Areivim Zeh LaZeh - all Jews are responsible for one another. A Mitzvah that - judging by the events of last weekend - Agudah seems to have all but abandoned.

*Hat Tip to my old HTC friend, Rabbi Menachem (Mort) Yolkut, Philadelphia PA

Shouting ‘Daas Torah’ from the Rooftops

One of the speakers addressing the Agudah convention was Rabbi Shimshon Sherrer, son of the legendary - decades long leader of Agudah , Rabbi Moshe Sherrer. I listened to his speech which is available on YouTube in two parts. (Part one above, part two below.)

My reaction is as follows. On the one hand I was not surprised by what he said although it still disappointed me. On the other hand I was surprised by who he attacked. Without mentioning him by name it was clear that he was referring to Rabbi Yitzchok Adlerstein. That was because he dared to express a view that is not in concert with Agudist dogma about their rabbinic authority. Rabbi Sherrer sees this as challenging the Torah itself and condemned it. He might as well have said the same thing about Rabbi Berl Wein who had similar criticisms.

He seemed to lump all non Agudists into the same anti Torah camp: Left wing, Centrist… it is all the same to him. Unless you are supportive of the pronouncements of Agudah - you are the enemy.

Rabbi Sherrer’s message is typical of the right. They see the Agudah Moetzes as representing the word of God. Daas Torah they call it. Anyone who dares to criticize it is to be rejected. In a reference to last week’s Parsha of Toldos he said they are to be considered ‘Yidei Esav’ - the hands of Esav out to destroy the Torah.

He then made a reference to the Talmud’s admonition to follow the religious leaders of your day and not compare them to the leaders of the past. The point was made in a story he told about a meeting his father had with Rav Aharon Kotler.

His father had read a newspaper critique of the Moetzes of Rav Aharon Kotler’s day that said they were being led astray by Askanim… that the Moetzes of Rav Kotler’s day was not the Moetzes of the previous generation whose leaders were the likes of R’ Chaim Ozer Grodzinski.

Rav Kotler shuddered at the thought and made Rav Sherrer remove the paper from his house. And then he proceeded to insist that - absolutely! …the current Moetzes IS R’ Chaim Ozer! How dare anyone say they aren’t?

The difference is the members of the Moetzes of RAK’s day were the likes of Rav Moshe Feinstein. He was not led astray by Askanim. On the other hand the members of today’s Moetzes are being led astray their own admission! For example - did Rabbi Sherrer forget about the Lipa Schmeltzer concert debacle of a couple of years ago where a member of the Moetzes admitted he was led astray?

For simplicity’s sake let us define Daas Torah as the will of God about issues not spelled out in the Torah - but is interpreted or intuited by the brightest Torah minds of our day. If one accepts that premise then one thing needs to be made clear. There are many bright Torah minds and not all of them are on the Agudah Moetzes. Rabbi Sherrer’s Daas Torah is not necessarily the definitive Daas Torah to the exclusion of all others. He can shout it from the rooftops all day long. That will not make it any more true.

It may be true for him. But it is not necessarily true for other observant Jews. There are other great Rabbanim who disagree with them that are equal to or in some cases may even be greater than his Rabbanim.

Same as in the past. There were Gedolim that were not on the Moetzes then whose ‘Daas Torah’ was just as valid as their contemporaries who were on the Moetzes. Those Gedolim were the elders of the current members and in some cases even their own Rebbeim. The current Moetzes certainly has the right to side with those predecessors with whom they agree. But they should not claim exclusive rights to the truth.

What about Rabbi Sherrer’s belief that the Agudah Moetzes is Daas Torah and anyone who criticizes it is anti Torah? In answer to that I will quote the words of Rav Soloveitchik spoken to alumni of Yeshiva University in the 70s. I have a recording of that event and I heard him say the following. It was in Yiddish. ‘Es gait mich nit uhn vos tutzech in die Agudah’. Translation: ‘I could not care less what goes on in the Agudah’. And this was when the Agudah had Gedolim like R’ Moshe on it.

Rav Sherrer wants to be a cheer leader for Agudah? Gezunte Heit. May he do so in good health. But please don’t try and sell us the propaganda that the current Moetzes is in effect infallible and that their every critic is an Esav even if he is Frum. He probably believes it - but it is empirically untrue. The more he and others like him try to do that, the less people will respect them.

Yes - the current Agudah Moetzes are tremendous Talmidei Chachamim. Their opinions are valuable. But they are not infallible; they have admitted mistakes; and most importantly they are not above the criticism of some of the brightest Orthodox minds of our day.

The Frum Blogs – Do We Matter?

Do the Frum blogs have any effect on rabbinic leaders such as those on the Agudah Moetzes? The answer has now been given in a public forum at the Agudah convention. At a Thursday night session described in a blog that reported on it - the internet was attacked it seems with an anger heretofore unseen. As it pertains to Frum Blogs - here is the money quote:

The topic discussed was The Internet and confronting unprecedented challengesof modern technology. Its dangers that have affected our community young and old alike including the content on frum blogs that is harmful to our community. Someone told him that those in Washington are reading these blogs and they said you don't know what harm it is doing to us. It has changed the way we are being perceived.

It certainly has changed the way they are being perceived. The very last post I wrote prior to this one testifies to that. Not only do I perceive them as dropping the ball on many issues, so have many people who they cannot condemn. People like Rabbi Berl Wein. Yes indeed the barrier has been breached. These leaders can no longer make pronouncements and ignore the feedback. That’s because of the internet.

I would however beg to differ with them on one thing. The Frum blogs that have fostered this change in perceptions are not harmful at all. They are beneficial. The era of unchallenged pronouncements is over. Not addressing major problems will be noticed. Mistakes will be challenged; and changes will be made. For example (although they may deny it -and I don’t see how they can) their approach to sex abuse is one major era of change that is directly attributable to the Frum blogs.

The angry tone expressed at the convention is quite understandable. No one likes their authority challenged. Especially those that see themselves as expressing Daas Torah every time they make a public pronouncement. Their angry tone last Thursday is apparently a reflection of their belief that Daas Torah itself is being undermined.

I don’t think that is the case at all. When the Frum blogs are on their game they just tell it like it is and express honest opinions based on their personal perspectives – perspectives they have which are based on sources other than those who make the pronouncements being criticized.

I have been told by sources in Agudah that when they condemn Frum blogs, they do not mean blogs like mine. I am grateful for that. I try and write in respectful tones when disagreeing with them because those leaders are Talmidei Chachamim who work very hard for Klal Yisroel. My criticism is based on differences of opinion I have with them on certain issues. Not on any personal animosity. My criticisms are made with the same goal in mind as theirs – to advocate what I believe to be best for Klal Yisroel.

There are those who challenge me – asking how I would dare assert my relatively ignorant (compared to those rabbinic leaders) opinions opposing them. Fair point. Except that I usually base my criticism on the views of other rabbinic figures who I consider of equal or greater stature than them.

All of this said, I do agree that some online criticism by some Frum blogs is disrespectful and ought to be stopped. It is not right and it undermines the message. And I include some of those who comment anonymously on these blogs – including mine. They are often very derogatory and ought to stop too. I try and delete or edit the disrespect out and admit that I don’t always succeed. But I try.

I would also add as I always do that I agree with Agudah on one thing. The dangers of the internet with respect to porn and addiction are every bit as real as they say it is. My only disagreement with them is in what to do about it.

In my view Frum Blogs are the Socrates of our time. Rabbinic leaders would do well to listen to some of those criticisms instead of only condemning them. They can start with Friday's post. Thank you Rabbi Wein.

Are Rabbinic Leaders Dropping the Ball?

Once again Rabbi Berel Wein has hit the proverbial nail on its head. He has just written an essay encompassing many of the things I deal with here and has virtually the same attitude about them. In short he sees the problems embedded in the Torah world and blames the religious leadership for it. Or rather the lack of it.

From the Jerusalem Post:

While there are many rabbinic pronouncements on the minutiae of Jewish law, customs and observance there is very little that is said and heard about the major problems that face the Jewish world – the security of the Jewish state, the dire financial situation that threatens the entire system of Jewish education, the astounding rate of poverty and unemployment (voluntary and involuntary) in religious Jewish society, children at risk because of one-size-fits-all educational institutions, growing rates of divorce and family dysfunction, an unhealthy and misogynic system of dating and marriage, growing anti-Semitism and a seemingly unstoppable rate of assimilation, secularization and intermarriage that guarantees a shrinking Jewish population in a few generations.

Had I said this I would it would be called ‘Gadol bashing’. But it isn’t when I say it and it isn’t when Rabbi Wein says it. It is merely looking at reality and telling it like it is. Until we recognize as a people that we have problems and pinpoint sources of those problems we cannot even begin to attempt a solution.

Rabbi Wein is so on target that his words needs to be read in their entirety. I have in fact said many of the same things in the past and I’m not going to repeat them here. If you want to know my attitude - read his essay.

What makes this especially important is that it is not coming from a modern Orthodox perspective. Near as I can tell – and I do not know him personally – Rabbi Wein would not want to peg himself as either Charedi or Modern Orthodox. (If I had to peg him I would call him a cross between a moderate Charedi and Right Wing Modern Orthodox.) But even though he may not call himself Charedi, he gets a lot of respect from the right. He also gets a lot of respect from me and - I’m sure - a lot of other Centrists.

Will Charedim agree with him on this issue? If Cross-Currents is any indication – they do! Although Rabbi Yitzchak Adlerstein may also be unpeggable - as a Musmach of Yeshivas Chafetz Chaim - and by the way he writes - I would tend to see him as a moderate Charedi. He has published his approbation of this essay right on that Charedi website.

Finally! ...there are responsible people who are respectful of the current rabbinic leadership - standing up and realizing that things are not as they should be... that the rabbinic leaders that so many people look up to - are dropping the ball.

Wiil that spur some change? Will the rabbinic leadership of an Agudah Moetzes (for example) take seriously the words of Rabbi Wein? Only time will tell.

Acceptance of Modern Orthodoxy by the Right

I look with bemusement at all of the discussion from right wing outlets like Cross-Currents about the current state of Modern Orthodoxy. The specific debate there now is about what to do with the ‘far left’. The debate seems to be about whether they should be ‘thrown out’ of Orthodoxy. In fact they have just done it again in a recent post. It is as though Modern Orthodoxy is only valid if it has the right wing seal of approval. An approval that can only happen if far left is thrown overboard.

And yet even though all this bothers me, I can’t deny that I do in fact seek right wing approval. It is indespensible to Orthodox unity.

The debate began when Rabbi Yitzchak Adlerstein advocating expulsion of the far left if Modern Orthodoxy wants to retain its credentials with the right. Rabbi Michael Broyde is of a different view and responded with a lenghty argument of his own. Modern Orthodoxy should not expel anyone who follows Halacha. But he is nonetheless similarly troubled by the excesses of the far left. Both Rabbis see a problem with the far left. They just differ in how to treat it. I tend to agree with Rabbi Broyde. I too am troubled by their excesses but do not think they should be expelled from Orthodoxy as long as they follow Halacha.

All this was addressed recently in an earlier post. However there is a very important underlying issue here: the acceptance of Modern Orthodoxy in any incarnation by the right. It is no secret that in some Charedi circles Modern Orthodxy and its flagship institution, Yeshiva University, is seen as completely unacceptable. One need not go too far to see this attitude. ‘Frumteens’ is but one website dedicated in part to this premise.

On the other hand Rabbi Adlerstein, a Musmach of Yeshivas Chafetz Chaim, feels that we are accepted and he cares enough about it to see to it that we stay that way. Although he has made clear that he and Rabbi Broyde have many differences in Hashkafa, I’m sure he unequivocally accepts him as a member in good standing of Orthodoxy. I am fairly certain that he accepts YU Rosh Yeshiva and Chancellor, Rabbi Dr. Norman Lamm in that category too.

But is Rabbi Adlerstein alone? How do the members of the Agudah Moetzes feel about it? Do they see Modern Orthodoxy in the same light? Or is Rav Elya Svei their prototype? He tried to boycott any event attended by then YU Predsident Norman Lamm - calling him a Sonei HaShem! And do they still feel about Rav Soloveitchik the way they did in their derogatory obituary of him - published in the now defunct ‘Jewish Observer’?

There is evidence that in some ways there is more acceptance in right wing circles now than there was before. Witness the recent articles in the Charedi magazines Mishpacha and Ami about a Yeshiva University icon, Rav Hershel Shachter. They were as respectful of him as they would be of any right wing Rosh Yeshiva. Is the Agudah Moetzes on the same page? Will Agudah give Rav Shachter a place on the dais at their DafYomi Siyum HaShas this coming summer? Perhaps even inviting him to speak? We shall see.

What about Charedi students? I am unfortunately all too familiar with horror stories of rejection of YU and anyone who has anything to do with it. I know of at least 2 separate cases like that. In one case a young man in Lakewood refused to be set up with Rav Shachter’s daughter because of his connection to YU. In another case - a father forbade his daughter to be set up with Rav Shachter’s son for the same reason.

But I also know the following. When Rav Shachter’s son was in the Mir he had indicated to the Rosh Yeshiva, Rav Nosson Tzvi Finkel that he wanted to go to Lakewood when he was done at the Mir. Rav Nosson Tzvi admonished him not to do that. He instead urged him go to YU so that he could benefit from his father’s Torah and be a positive influence on the students there.

I have long maintained that Yeshiva University is a Makom Torah no less than Lakewood. Yes, there are problems there. But there are problems in Lakewood too. And yet to my chagrin any positive expression about YU is often ridiculed by the right.

So where does the truth lie? Is Yeshiva University no longer the ‘enemy territory’ that the Charedi world considered it to be? As was the case when Rav Elchanan Wasserman absolutely refused to give a guest Shiur there?

My hope is that it is Rabbi Alderstein’s attitude has taken hold – where we can accept each other as fully Orthodox Jews while respectfully differing in Hashkafa.

I have said many times that the two worlds are uniting culturally. The right wing of Modern Orthodoxy and moderate Charedim are becoming one social unit that I call the new centrists. I hope that Charedi leaders of the type that are on the Agudah Moetzes will follow suit. They can make a big statement at the next Daf Yomi Siyum HaShas.

One more thing. I know many people think acceptance by the right is unimportant. I disagree. We cannot have any kind of Orthodox unity without them.

Thanking God for America and its Bounty

As I do every year at this time of year - I want to publicly express my gratitude to this great country on this special day. I am truly blessed to be alive and living in America.

Many people may not realize that Thanksgiving was originally based on Sukkos – or more specifically Shemini Atzeres. The idea was to be to thankful to God for a bountiful harvest. The Pilgrims were very much oriented toward what they call the Old Testament – our Torah.

It is a totally secular holiday today. I can think of no better day to express Hakaras HaTov than on Thanksgiving. And no better way - for those who choose to do so - than in the shared American experience of families eating turkey in their homes all across America. This is what my Rebbe, Rav Ahron and his illustrious brother, the Rav did. So whether you are eating turkey or not, celebrate the day.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Back to the Stone Age!

Extremists who glorify the destruction of useful property as a Kiddush HaShem are going to end up destroying us. And yet that seems to be the direction the Charedi world is going in.

I know that they think cell phones are evil. Despite how ridiculous that sounds to most normal people, I can understand why they see them that way. Just to mention a few of the problems this technological advancement has created:

Half Shabbos. That is the term applied to Frum Jews – mostly young people – who are so addicted to texting that they can’t stop doing it even on Shabbos.

But even without the Chilul Shabbos issue. The addiction causes huge amounts of wasted time - often chattering about nothing!

And then there is the access to internet. We all know the dangers that contains. What makes the cell phone particularly insidious is that internet access is so easily accessible and so easy to hide. Porn can be seen in an instant in the palm of your hand - and then deleted an instant later without anyone being the wiser.

So what is the solution to this problem? In the black and white - all or nothing world of Charedim it means destroying any possible use of the medium in a glorified fashion. Here is what one Yeshiva head in Israel did. From YWN:

Bochrim of the Darkei Shalom Yeshiva in Telshe Stone on motzei Shabbos took part in a seudas mitzvah as they called it marking the burning of their cellular telephones.

After a schmooze from the mashgiach of the yeshiva, HaRav Yerucham Schechter, the talmidim collected their cellular telephones and placed them in a collective fire to remove the evil influence from their midst.

According to Chadrei Chareidim, rabbonim of the yeshiva took part in the event, labeled a Seudas Kiddush Hashem.

But it isn't only cellphones. Other media under attack are computers and TVs. They too are in the category of evil. More from YWN:

Rav Amnon Yitzchak appears to now be directing his energy against televisions in people’s homes. Apparently the rav is planning a major event next much, during which 1,000 televisions will be thrown into a giant dumpster, Chadrei Chareidim reports.

The event is planned to take place on 10 Kislev, Tuesday, December 6th, in front of Israel Broadcasting Authority (IBA).

Not that this is the first time something like this happened. Just last year another Yeshiva head did virtually the same thing with laptops - adding that it was better to be a street cleaner than to get a job requiring the use of a computer. That was particularly insidious because he teaches the newly religious who are naïve and impressionable about what is right and wrong in Judaism. They have no frame of reference about it other than what their particular mentor tells them. How sad that this myopic understanding of Judaism is sold to them as truth to the exclusion of all else!

Sometimes I feel like these extremists would be happiest living in the Stone Age!

I am not going to reiterate the benefits of these media. Been there and done that. We all know that there is good and bad contained in them. We also know that sometimes the consequences of abusing those media can be devastating.

The point here - as always - is not to deny the downside of these things. Anyone with a modicum of intelligence will recognize that. The problem is that in the world of extremes that is increasingly defining the Charedi world - the solutions to these problems is to eliminate the medium entirely. The idea of using these media judiciously does not occur to them. Either that or they simply consider the risk of ‘contamination’ to great.

This approach has unintended consequences. Very negative ones. I believe that this approach is at least in part responsible for things like Burka ladies. Those are women who have gotten the message. They have learned that the all or nothing approach applies to everything – including modesty in dress. They ‘get it’. There is no gray… so they cover up their entire bodies - face included.

Not only does their approach contribute to the Burka lady phenomenon, it also contributes to the Off the Derech (OTD) phenomenon. Here is what ‘Project Yes’ director Rabbi Yakov Horowitz said last year about the laptop trashing event:

I see no need to comment on the ceremony itself other than to condemn it and the extremist and violent message it sends impressionable young people in the strongest of terms. We are not well served conducting ceremonies – especially in venues that will be spread worldwide in a matter of moments – that invoke images of book burnings and the like...

If I was asked al regel achas (lit. “on one foot”) to list the “Top Five” causes of kids going off the derech, they would be, in order:

1. Child abuse/molestation/neglect
2. Lack of simchas chayim/shalom bayis at home
3. Poor parenting or overbearing parents
4. Undiagnosed or unaddressed learning disabilities.
5. Extremism (lack of flexibility in raising children and forcing them into the same mold)

With that in mind, I suggest that following Rabbi Feinhandler’s dangerous advice of a) rejecting jobs for adults that require Internet use (read: almost any job that earns north of $30,000- annually) and b) allowing one’s children to be raised uneducated to the extent that they become “street cleaners” will directly trigger at least 4 out of the 5 risk factors.

Need I say more?

Do Not Give Them Any Money

I remember this incident. Back in 2008 an electronics store owner was beaten by some bearded long coated thugs in the Geula section of Jerusalem that borders Meah Shearim. What was his ‘crime’? He was selling forbidden electronics - like mp4 players. One of those thugs, Shmuel Veisfish, was sentenced to 2 years in prison last January. He appealed his sentenced to the high court in Israel. The Jerusalem Post reports that his appeal was denied. This is good news.

Mr. Veisfish is a member of a group known as Sikrikim. Sikrikim is a loosely transliterated form of the Latin word Sicarii. Here is the Wikipedia definition:

Sicarii (Latin plural of Sicarius 'dagger-men' or later contract-killer, Hebrew סיקריקיס) is a term applied, in the decades immediately preceding the destruction of Jerusalem in 70 AD, (probably) to an extremist splinter group of the Jewish Zealots, who attempted to expel the Romans and their partisans from Judea using concealed daggers (sicae).

These people consider themselves zealots for their people and their ways. They see their extremist lifestyles as the only legitimate Jewish way to live. Others, no matter how religious they are seen as the enemy to one extent or another - to be eradicated by any means necessary.

I have long criticized the community that spawned these people for tolerating – if not approving of them. Not the least among them deserving criticism is their rabbinic leadership. They have done little more than verbally condemn them.

Now one of them is being sent to prison where he belongs. He will suffer the consequences of his actions as will his family. But he is not the only member of the Sikrikim. There are probably dozens if not hundreds more like him. And they have established Sicarri branches all over Israel.

One of the more prominent places they have done this is in suburban Ramat Bet Shemesh – B. As a result, there has been a continuous flow of violence against other Jews – religious or otherwise. To name just a few examples of their handiwork: Kosher restaurants have been torched; elderly religious women have been beaten on buses; religious teenager girls have been beaten on Friday nights as they passed through their neighborhoods; rocks have been thrown through car windshields as they passed through their neighborhood because they were flying Israeli flags...

In one case a couple of years ago a very Charedi man who had moved there from America because of the religious environment was beaten so badly that he had to be hospitalized. Why was he so badly beaten? Because he dared to challenge them publicly.

Most recently religious elementary school children were harassed and taunted by them because the municipality granted them the use of a school bordering on their neighborhood.

As I have said in the past, most of the residents there do not approve of the violence. But they do approve of the goals and I’m pretty sure they are happy when the desired results are achieved.

The question is, where do these Sikrikim get their financial support from? I am told that there are certain people in enclaves like Monsey and Williamsburg who actually support their ‘good works’ and donate money specifically to their cause. But I am equally certain that they often hide their true purpose and just go from shul to shul; house to house as Meshulachim - asking for donations without specifying exactly who they are or what they do.

As a public service I am posting a message that was forwarded to me by Mrs. Etana Hecht on behalf of Rabbi Dov Lipman. He is in the forefront of fighting these people. He is a resident of that area. And I consider him to be a hero for his courage and determination. More power to him. I urge people to heed the message. It follows:

There are 2 Sikrikim who left for America last week to raise funds. Their names are Avraham Hirschmann and Shalom Baruch Rosset. They have been directly linked to the violence in Bet Shemesh and Jerusalem.

Rosset's son is one of the guys who beat up a Gerrer Chassid last week, and has very high legal fees due to past violent incidences that he's trying to collect for. We're trying to get the word out to as many people as possible that if they end up in your neighborhood NOT to donate to them.

If you'd like to verify this further, or have more questions, please email Rabbi Lipman at ddlipman@gmail.com

Thanks in advance for helping to protect the citizens of Jerusalem and Bet Shemesh.

Sex Abuse - Unanswered Questions

Yesterday I was privileged to attend an event entitled ‘If You Know Something, Say Something’. It dealt with sex abuse in the Orthodox community and the message was if one knows about sex abuse it should be made known to the authorities; ‘If You Know Something, Say Something’.

There were several speakers at this event including the Av Beis Din of the RCA and CRC - Rav Gedalia Dov Schwartz. He spoke about the Halachic aspects of Lashon Hara and Mesira in the context of reporting abuse to the authorities. Citing Halachic sources (the Aruch HaShulchan and Tzitz Eliezer) he stated unequivocally that when it comes to sex abuse, or any abuse for that matter, not only does Lashon Hara not apply, neither does Mesirah. Mesirah does not in any case apply in countries governed by the rule of law - including even the Czarist Russia of the Aruch HaShulchan’s time - one of the most anti Semitic governments in Jewish history.

If one is aware of abuse taking place one should call the police even on Shabbos. What about asking a rabbi first? Rav Schwartz retorted that if one saw a fellow Jew breaking and entering a neighbor’s house to steal from him - would they first ask a rabbi before reporting him to the police?! It doesn’t matter if the criminal is a Jew or a non Jew. If a crime is committed in a country where the rule of law reigns, one is obligated to report it to the police.

Mrs. Rachel Zimmerman spoke next. She heads Project Sheild which is an organization in Chicago dedicated to help victims of sex abuse. She encouraged anyone who knows about abuse whether victim or witness to come forward to Project Shield and be helped.

And then there was Ms. Barbara Blaine. She is the founder and President of SNAP – Surivors Network of those Abused by Priests. She was riveting. She spoke of the major problem in the Catholic Church which is only now even beginning to be addressed. She cited a statistic stating that the Church itself estimates that at least 6000 of its priests have been or are involved in some sort of abusive behavior. This was a shocking statistic to me.

She then told the story of her own abuse by a priest as teenager in Toledo, Ohio. Her description of the devout religious community she was raised in sounded eerily familiar. Their entire lives revolved around the church and their hierarchy. Priests were venerated as near saints. What ever they said was law – never questioned. And their superiors – Monsignors, Bishops, and Cardinals - were their Gedolim. Their words venerated as though coming from God.

Ms. Blaine described how her parish priest - so revered by her family and her community sought her out over 7 siblings because of her ‘Frumkeit’ . Ironically her twin sister was a rebel. But it was the devout sister was that was chosen for the honor of being raped by the priest. At that point her life was changed. Her grades suffered as did her social life. She felt different from her friends. She felt alone. She felt dirty.

Eventually telling her parents, they decided to go to the priest’s superior - the Monsignor. He told them that they should keep it quiet and that they would deal with internally. Reporting it to the police would irreparably harm the church. Besides this was his first infraction. The parents being good Catholics listened to their religious leaders and did not report it to the police. It turned out that it was in fact not is first infraction and his superiors knew it. They had been receiving reports about his abuse for decades prior to Ms. Blaine’s rape and covering it up. And it continued many years after that.

Mutiply that by 6000. It makes me sick to my stomach.

The last speaker was Mrs. Judy Brown. She is the Eishes Chayil who authored the book ‘Hush’. The BeShaitled and modestly dressed Mrs. Brown testified to her Orthodoxy. She was even more riveting that Ms. Blaine. Not so much by what she said, but by how she said it. She projected a sense of both sadness and anger. Her words were almost identical to my review of her book. It described the two worlds of Chasidus in which she was raised. She called them the upper-world and the under-world. The upper world was so sheltered that that words like sex, rape, and molestation were unheard of– never uttered. Those who dared to ever use words like that in that world were considered evil.

Anyone even hinting that there might be sex abuse in their community was ostracized. And then there was the lower world where those things actually happened. She lived in both worlds and described one case she knew of where the pain of an abused boy was so great that he ended up drinking some bleach. The upper-world ever in denial painted an innocent picture of that event saying that the boy thought it was milk. He survived only to later commit suicide successfully.

Mrs. Brown’s theory of why the Chasidic world is in such denial is that it is the result of the Holocaust. Religious survivors wanted to rebuild in America the idealized world they came from. They succeeded. But their view of the European model was distorted. Sex abuse existed there too. But because of the devastation of the Holocaust and their determination to rebuild, they remain to this day in denial about it.

Over all yesterday’s event was successful as measured by the message and attendance. Although I was a bit disappointed by what seemed to be a 3-1 ratio of women to men – I was glad to see an overflow crowd there.

But to be honest I left a bit disappointed. There were some serious questions that remained unaddressed in my mind. The primary one being a source of much controversy. In cases of doubt - how is one to determine what is considered Raglayim L’Davar – credible evidence of abuse? Who should determine it - Rabbis? ...or trained and experienced professionals who deal with these things?

No one denies when there is a fire you put it out. One who witnesses abuse should not hesitate to call 911 even on Shabbos. But what if someone only suspects it – without witnessing it? Should we believe anyone who ever comes forward with an accusation every single time and immediately go to the police?

The quick answer the last question is yes. Let the police and their trained professional psychiatrists sort it out. It is well known that when a child comes forward with an accusation - the vast majority of the time it is true.

What about the rare instances when an accusation is false? Victim advocates say that we must always err on the side of the child accuser rather than the accused, no matter how pure the reputation of the accused is. Victim advoctes understand that a false accusation can have lifelong consequences even when all questions of guilt have been removed and the accused has been exonerated – even when the victim recants.

But they say that erring on the side of the victim is far more important because - as Ms. Blaine pointed out - an abused child that is not believed has far more serious consequences often including suicide. And as Mrs. Brown pointed out, over 70% of children who go off the Derech (OTD) have been abused.

I agree with that assessment. But that does not make it any easier for someone who has been falsely accused. His life will be altered. So again how does one determine when a suspicion of abuse warrants reporting it to the police? ...and who gets to decide when and what to report? I wish those issues would have been addressed yesterday. Maybe next time.

Updated: 5:20PM CST

A Priest Speaks in Shul

Last week a Roman Catholic Priest was invited to address an Orthodox Shul on Shabbos morning during Shachris. That statement - left alone - is quite shocking. On the surface I can’t think of too many things more shocking to Orthodox Jewish sensitivities than that. And yet it happened. And it was probably a Kiddush HaShem.

How is that possible - one is may ask? Because it was not just an ordinary priest who spoke. It was an extraordinary priest – an extraordinary human being. From the Yated:

Reverend Patrick Debois is no ordinary Roman Catholic priest. He has made it his life’s work to uncover mass Jewish graves in the Ukraine, the final resting place of Jews who were shot by the Nazis and their Ukrainian accomplices in a most brutal way. He goes from village to village in the Ukraine interviewing elderly people and gathering testimony about the atrocities committed. As a priest, he is able to open people’s hearts, minds and mouths as they make what is akin to a “confession” of the sins and atrocities that they saw or in which they were participants or accomplices. He documents and films each of those testimonies and has uncovered many Babi Yar-like mass graves that dot the landscape of the Ukraine.

According to information that Rabbi Billet has publicly provided about him and independent research, he certainly seems to be one of the chasidei umos haolam (righteous gentiles) who deserves our unreserved praise and admiration.

In short this man – because he is a priest - has done what no Jew could have ever done. And he has made it his life’s work.

That should be the beginning and end of it. He deserves our undying gratitude for helping the Jewish people get some small measure of justice from one of the darkest periods in Jewish history. As Rabbi Herschel Billet who invited this priest indicated I can think of no greater Kiddush HaShem than honoring this man. In his own words:

“I believe that it is most appropriate for this event to take place in our main sanctuary. The sanctuary is the place where we try to sanctify Hashem’s name each day. We have the opportunity to do that in receiving Father Desbois this week with respect.”

First a minor quibble. Referring to Father Debois as Reverend Debois in the op-ed dishonors him. I’m not sure why it is that Charedim are so afraid to refer to him by that honorific. Perhaps they think it would imply some sort of recognition or legitimization of Christianity – I don’t know. But it doesn’t. It is just an honorific like the word ‘Rabbi’ is. And it is no different than referring to a Reform rabbi as rabbi. It does not imply validation of a denomination or a religion. ‘Father’ is how they are known. That is what we should call them.

But that is not my main issue here. It is his protestation of the event – mild though it may seem.

I understand where he is coming from. My opening comment should explain why. But at the same time his objection is misplaced. One can quibble about the venue. But that complaint is so overwhelmed by the deeds that this man does that it makes any criticism at all seem petty. In my view it diminishes the very Hakaras HaTov he admits we should have.

There is no holding back praise of this Father Debois. He deserves our full measure of it. Any criticism post facto not only does not serve us well, it may in fact be a Chilul HaShem. Does Rabbi Lazerson think that the Yated is some sort of secret underground paper that only Charedi Jews read? I can assure him that Modern Orthodox Jews read it too, and I’ll bet that there are more than a few Roman Catholics that will read this op-ed – either online or via e-mail or printed copies forwarded to them. Doesn’t he realize that many of our non Jewish friends will put off by such criticism? ...rightly so?

That said I would also expect that Father Debois would not be one of those put off by it. He is an unusual man and I’ll bet he would even be respectful of this kind of criticism – realizing full well that it is sourced in the fact that Jews do not accept the divinity of Jesus. This would be the manner of a man dedicated to in some small measure to righting a wrong done to a very small segment of humanity - the Jewish people.

Sometime I wonder if we aren’t our own worst enemy. Even with the best of intentions.

Was there something wrong with having a priest speak in a Shul? No. Not in this case. Not this priest. He has no interest in converting us. He has no interest in doing anything but the right thing. God bless him - and all the Chasidei Umos HaOlam.

Love Letters

In last week’s Memo to ArtScroll I had expressed my hope that if and when they write the biography of Rav Nosson Tzvi Finkel, that they do not whitewash his background to conform with their worldview. Rav Nosson Tzvi grew up in a modern Orthodox background and was not shy about it. He often referenced it when he thought it appropriate.

In the course of that post I made reference to Rav Nosson Kamenetsky (RNK) and his book Making of a Gadol (MOAG)– a book that was banned by the right wing in Israel. It contained what they perceived to be unflattering comments about certain Gedolim. One of their criticisms was about Rav Aharon Kotler’s letters to his Kallah. In my post I at first referred to them as love letters.

That was deemed inappropriate by many commenters on the right. I defended it. And to my great surprise and satisfaction so did a brilliant Talmid Chacham who can hardly be called Modern Orthodox, Rabbi Yosef Gavriel Bechhofer (RYGB). Here is what he said in response to the claim that Rav Aharon NEVER wrote ANY love letters to his Kallah:

That is total slander against Reb Aharon. Why wouldn't he write love letters to his Kallah?!

To be honest I have no way of knowing what was written in those letters. Which is why I modified the post and eliminated the word ‘love”. However it is highly unlikely that anyone knows the actual contents of those letters. Were they love letters? Who knows. The right wing angrily insists that they were nothing of the sort. And this attitude generated a number of comments of which the following by someone named Yosef is typical:

RHM, you really are way off here. For starters. you and YGB claim there would be nothing wrong if Rav Aharon wrote love letters to his Kallah. RNK seems to disagree, as The Alter and Rav Isser Zalman criticized Rav Aharon for it. But it is apparent as day that RNK did a terrible injustice here. He distinctly gave people, including yourself, the impression that those letters Rav Aharon wrote were love letters. And that they were inappropriate according to the Alter and Rav Isser Zalmen both. But he retains the right to deny he ever said that. He never did say it outright, but the spin on the story makes it seem so. RNK does not even deny any of the above. He agrees that there is no evidence that those letters were criticized because of a lack of tznius. But that's the readers' impression. The Frumteens Moderator hit the nail squarely on the head, and explained accurately what the problem is with MOAG. RNK can be one of the 36 Tzadikim (like RNS) but his book is a distortion of the truth, and should be rejected by anyone who cares about Emes.

(Frumteens is a vile website that among other things is dedicated to the destruction of Modern Orthodoxy. Although they may deny it.)

What is quite evident from Yosef's comment is that the right wing sees romantic love as something evil. Even hinting that a Gadol with the stature of Rav Ahron Kotler would have ever expressed something as base as love in a letter to his Kallah is seen as a terrible canard. Rav Kamenetsky’s mention of it in his book lowers the esteem we all have about the Kedusha that defined Rav Kotler’s entire life and therefore deserved to be banned.

The following is my response.

Anyone who thinks that my esteem (or the esteem of anyone with normal emotions) for Rav Kotler has been lowered because he dared to say he loved his Kallah in a letter - is seriously mistaken. In fact the opposite is true. It raises my already considerable esteem for him.

This is one of the problems with the right. They must believe that romantic love is a disgusting thing. Which is why it is a Genai (put down) to say that a Gadol like Rav Kotler would express it to his Kalla.

That Rav Kamenetsky subsequently said he didn't mean love letters is besides the point. He realizes how his community feels about it. They hear the word ‘love’ and immediately conjure up images of 'Hollywood and the movies!'

This is one of the definitive differences between the right and the rest of Orthodox Jewry. The right always think in black and white terms. There is no finesse. No shades of gray. No nuance. It is either right or wrong. Black or white. Expressing love is to a Kallah is an unholy ‘Hollywood’ like act that a Torah True Jew would never do. And even if he would - publicizing is it at best immodest. If it happens to be said in a book like MOAG… deny, deny, deny! How dare anyone write that Rav Kotler expressed love to his Kallah in a letter. Disgusting!

Welcome to the world of the right wing.

This is not the way of the modern Orthodox world. We do not see loving one’s Kallah as something disgusting that must be hidden. We take pride in it. I loved my Kallah too when we were engaged. And I have no qualms about letting the world know about it now. In fact to imply that I would never express such a thought to her is an insult to both of us! And as Rabbi Bechhofer implied it is an insult to Rav Aharon Kotler as well.

An Existential Threat

Rabbi Dovid Landesman calls them museums. These are communities like Bnei Brak and Meah Shearim that want to preserve intact the insular European Jewish Shtetl. They believe that this model is the best way to prevent any outside influences from seeping in. But preserving the past like a museum and embellishing it is not the model for a vibrant Jewish future. The extreme lifestyles lived and attitudes expressed in places like Bnei Brak and Meah Shearim are unsustainable. If Orthodox Jewry were to follow this model in a major way our future would be in jeopardy. That brings me to an article in Arutz Sheva published last week.

Ephraim Halevy is at best ill informed about basic Halacha– despite his Orthodox upbringing. And his recent attack against Charedim –some might say - classifies him as a Rasha. This former head of the Israeli Mossad made headlines last week when he said: Israel’s hareidi Jews' radicalization is a bigger threat to Israel than Iran.

Normally I would just chalk it up as anti Charedi rhetoric that is so often heard in leftist secular circles. There is no shortage of animosity towards religious Jews there. The problem is that even though he is over the top in his criticism, he is not that far off in his perception of a demographic time bomb that - were it to continue - could destroy the State of Israel.

According to the article his problem was something a little less serious. He is apparently upset that boys and girls don’t dance together the way they did in his old Bnei Akiva days. I guess Halacha is not his forte.

But I would not sell short his underlying point that Charedi radicalization in Israel is a big problem. I have written about it many times. The biggest problem is not the laughable example mentioned in the article about the loss of mixed dancing.

It is the attempt at perpetuating an unsustainable economic situation that is. It is the Charedi refusal to allow the slightest amount of secular studies into their high school curriculum that is. This situation contributes mightily to their poverty problem and the economic burden on the government upon whose support Charedi Avreichim rely.

The radicalization of religious observance not only turns off secular Jews, it turns off Dati Jews. It even turns off moderate Charedim. On these issues – he would be correct. The existential danger is very great.

Some might say that defending a clearly ‘anti Frum’ bigot like Halevy puts me in the same category of Rasha. Well, I don’t think he is a Rasha. And I don’t think his statement can be so easily dismissed.

There is someone else who defends him. He is a Charedi Rav and Knesset member by the name of Chaim Amsallem (pictured above). He has the courage of his convictions. He has withstood tremendous pressure - going out on a limb many times to speak truth to power. For this he has been ostracized by Sephardi Gadol , Rav Ovadia Yosef. This perplexes me since Rav Yosef has actually made some of the same crticisms himself. Be that as it may Rav Amsallem remains undeterred.

Now he has done it again. From Yeshiva World News:

Amsellem explains that we must come to the realization that the chareidi community is moving too far to the right, citing a number of examples such as the stepped-up intolerance on buses, demanding total segregation, and the most recent incident, the minister of religious affairs disqualifying Tzohar rabbonim from performing marriages…

Ephraim Halevy is basically doing what I have been doing for some time. Take a mirror and place it in front of the chareidim and look. What do you see? The image in the eyes of a non-frum person is not a pleasant one.

How true. I’m sure he has now dug an even deeper hole for himself in Charedi circles. But I give him credit and hope he keeps on ‘telling it like it is’.

We need more voices like his coming from the Charedi world. Criticisms of him are unjust in my view. What he wants for his people is for them to survive and become a viable and vibrant community where extremism is discarded and moderation takes its place. He wants to see the tens of thousands of average Avreichim currently sitting in Kollelim get training and good jobs.

He does not want to destroy Kollelim. He wants to strengthen them for those who should be there – those with potential to be the Yechidei Segula. The rest who are ‘also learning in Kollel’ should instead be supporting their families by working. Rav Amsallem sees the handwriting on the wall - if Charedi families continue to increase at exponential levels and do not do anything to prepare themselves for the workplace their house of cards will collapse.

He understands that you can’t keep putting all Charedi men into the same full time ‘learning/non earning’ pot and expect this community to survive indefinitely. As the Charedi population increases and becomes a larger percentage of the whole, there will be less money to distribute to more people. It does not take a rocket scientist to do the simple math here.

What about the comparison to Iran? Iran’s nuclear capabilities are no joke. But a diligent world all working toward the same goal of preventing them from becoming a nuclear power will hopefully keep them in check. Add to this the fact that the biggest superpower in the world, the US, has not taken the military option off the table. And neither has Israel. So even though Iran is something very serious to worry about, there are things being done about it. The same thing cannot be said about the Charedi demographic time bomb.

Rabbi Amsallem understands that the world of Charedim is not a sustainable as is. He is fighting for change. And when he sees the truth being spoken by any source, he will defend it. More power to him.

From Jane Hughes to Sarah Brooks

I often speak about my great admiration for Baalei Teshuva and Gerim - converts. An article in the Jewish Week reinforces that in me.

The article is about New York Times conservative columnist David Brooks. What does that have to do with the price of tea in China? Nothing really. He is neither a Baal Teshuva in the commonly used sense of the term, nor a Ger. He is Jewish. But one has to go back several generations to see any connection to observant Judaism at all. His maternal great grandfather had a Kosher butcher shop on the Lower East Side of New York. The road his family took after that was entirely secular. How secular? Here is Brooks’ description:

I went to Grace Church School, sang in the choir, went to an Episcopal camp.” He also went to Hebrew school at the 14th Street Y, and the family celebrated holidays, but it was a “bar mitzvah-then-you’re-done” kind of Judaism.

He eventually ‘married out’ to a non Jewish woman by the name of Jane Hughes. 3 years later Jane Hughes became Sarah Brooks after deciding to convert to Judaism. I don’t know if her conversion was an acceptably Orthodox one. I suspect that it was done by a Conservative rabbi. But that is not my issue here.

My issue here is sincerity and idealism. And to make the point about why I consider people who choose observant Judaism to be on such a high level. These are people who the rest of us - those of us who were born Jewish and into religious families - should look up to. They are people that we should emulate. They will often put the rest of us to shame by dint of their devotion to our religion. Their decision to become Jewish and observe Jewish law is done for idealistic reasons rather than out of habit or in some cases for social reasons.

As is often the case with converts and Baalei Teshuva, Mrs. Brooks is far more observant than her husband by his own admission. And she has succeeded in bringing him into more observance. They now keep a Kosher home. She apparently uses a Mikva and actually volunteers as a Mikva Lady. But most importantly she sends their children to Jewish day schools. Coming from a completely non Jewish background and marrying a totally secular Jew who couldn’t care less about his wife being Jewish let alone observant… it is a truly inspiring thing to see!

Lessons can be learned here. It behooves us all to re-examine our lives and rededicate ourselves to doing the will of God as best as we can understand it. We can and should look at Mrs. Brooks as example for doing things L’Shma. Her every religious action is done because she believes in them. This is how she thinks. This is how every Jew should think.

Attention Charedi Young Women 22 and Older – You Are Old Maids!

I’m not sure exactly how a new program apparently supported by Agudah will help the growing problem of older singles in the Charedi world. The project is called NASI. I have had no luck finding out even what the letters NASI stand for (if anything). A lengthy and somewhat rambling description of the problems older singles face in the Torah world and this ‘remedy’ for it can be found in Yeshiva World News.

As best as I can understand it, NASI suggests throwing massive amounts of money at Shadchanim as an incentive to set up these older singles. The claim is that older singles (which can be as young as 22) are left out of the Shadchan’s dating pool because there are simply so many younger girls available for 22 year old males who have begun dating. Charedi males simply do not date at a younger age.

This has created an age gap between when young men who start dating versus when young women start dating. Girls start at about age 18 or 19 usually right out of a year or two in a post high school seminary. Boys on the other hand tend to stay in a Beis HaMedrash focused on their learning until about age 22 or 23. This leaves several times as many women as men in the dating pool. Young men can choose to date women of any age between age 18 and 22. And as they get older the dating pool renews every year adding younger females and creating more older singles.

If I understand correctly the idea of NASI is for an older young woman (22 and up) to deposit huge amounts of money with a Shadchan that would only be taken if there is a successful engagement as a result of that Shadchan. If not, the money is fully returnable – including the $500 management fee taken by NASI. The older the young woman - the more money would be deposited with the Shadchan. In other words - for the right kind of money, they will begin to recommend older single women to the young men they know.

How demeaning! And how disgusting it is for any organization to take financial advantage of the plight of young women desperate to get married and yet considered by their society as virtual old maids!

What does it say about us as that young unmarried woman older than 22 are considered damaged goods - old maids by Charedi dating standards? And that the best way to solve this problem is by throwing huge sums of money at it? How must a young woman aged 22 and older feel about herself?

The following excerpt illustrates the mindset:

Suppose he told a 30 year old young woman that if she donated $11,000 to to a particular cause she would be married by Chanuka. What would the young woman do? You know and I know that every single young woman would beg, borrow, or do whatever it takes but she would put the money together.

If this is what the dating game has devolved into in the Charedi world it is yet another blow to an unsustainable system and a disgusting one at that.

Although the problem described above is a legitimate one it is a self created one. It is no less the result of an over emphasis on the separation of the sexes than it is on the supposed age gap.

I have said this before but it bears repeating in this context. There ought to be far more interaction between the sexes in the Charedi world than there is now. Instead of forever expanding the boundaries between men and woman they ought to be narrowing them.

This trend is being set by Chasidic communites that have a different set of dating parameters than the rest of the Charedi world has. They set up marriages at very young ages for both men and women. It is not unusual for 19 year old boys and girls to get married. There is no dating as we know it. The parents ‘date’ and arrange a meeting or 2 between a couple whom they believe to be compatible. The system works for them and I am not judging it.

That this would never fly in Modern Orthodox circles is an understatement. But it doesn’t even fly in Charedi circles. Charedi men and women date. They go out many times before the ‘question is popped’. They get to see for themselves if there is any compatibility.

Chasidim can therefore live in a world where the sexes are as far apart as ever. Never having even the slightest interaction between the sexes does not effect their marriage prospects. They are all in the same Shiddach boat and their rate of engagements and successful marriages do not seem to be negatively affected by the ‘no social contact’ rules. They do not seem to be having the same ‘Shiddach crisis’ that the Charedi world has.

And yet the Charedi world can’t wait to adopt the latest ‘separation’ Chumra initiated by Chasidim. The sexes are now more separated then ever – thanks to the desire by Charedim not to be outdone in Frumkeit by Chasidim. Perfectly normal and healthy ways for young men and women to meet have been virtually eliminated. Now a Shadchan – whether parent, friend, or professional – is the only legitimate way for Charedim to date.

The idea of a boy meeting a girl at a social event like a wedding is completely ruled out as acceptable. The idea of a young man calling up a young woman he met and asking her on a date is so outrageous that a young man might be black-balled for doing it. He will be written out of the dating pool and be looked at very suspiciously - and to be avoided by any right thinking Charedi girl.

How sad is it that all such contact is now seen in such a negative light. How sad that 2 people can’t meet under casual conditions, find that they like each other’s company and pursue a relationship without a middle man.

There are many Halachicly permissible ways for young men and women to meet. But they have all been virtually banned. And that has added immensely the Shiddach crisis as much as any age gap. They can meet in family settings, school, social organizations like Bnei Akiva or later as advisors for NCSY. There are weddings and Bar Mitzvas, Kiddush after Shul on Shabbos… many ways!

But the direction Charedim are going is an opposite one. They keep doing their best to find even more ways to separate the sexes just so they won’t be outdone in Frumkeit by their Chasidic counterparts: Separate seating at weddings; separate buses; separate seating at concerts... even banning them altogether because of the mere possibility of a boy and girl meeting there who end up (Oh No!) …talking to each other.

I know some very fine Charedi young couples who ‘cheated’. They met in high school behind the backs of their school principals. They were careful not to get caught because they would have been expelled. Eventually they got married and are role models of successful marriage! And they are approximately the same age. No age gap due to the dating habits of the Charedi world.

Just to be clear, I do not support the idea of coed religious high schools for reasons I have stated in the past and do not want to get into here. Nor do I think dating for purposes other than marriage is a good idea. But I do not support the level of separation that exists now. It is a bad idea and fosters the kind of solutions advocated by NASI. This does not mean I am opposed to Shadchanim. Whatever works. I just think they ought not to have a monopoly in the dating game… and to loosen up the system.

What to do about this? I don’t know that I can change the world. But it wouldn't take that much. A simple thing like advocating mixed seating at weddings including seating young adult singles together would be a good start.

Sadly this will never happen - let alone any of the other ideas I mention. Instead the chasm will continue widening and the Shiddach crisis among Charedim will keep growing. Furthermore Shiddach problems like this are even affecting some Modern Orthodox circles as they continue their own ‘slide to the right’ - adopting some of the same strictures that Charedim do. So Charedim… take out your wallets! And Modern Orthodox… you’re next.

Zeroing Out Foreign Aid and Political Demagoguery

In the last Republican debate – political pundits have made much about a comment made by Presidential candidate Rick Perry with respect to zeroing out foreign aid – even to Israel. His idea is to basically to stop all foreign aid to all countries now receiving it and have them all start over – reapplying for it with a requirement to justify every dollar it requests to congress.

This kind of talk usually sends shivers down the spines of my coreligionists. Understandably so. Foreign aid to Israel is absolutely vital to its very existence. Most of it goes to its defense establishment. It enables Israel to buy the latest arms and take advantage of the latest arms technology - all for use in protecting its citizens.

But frankly I kind of like the idea. Here’s why. I do not have the slightest doubt in my mind that the US congress will continue to fund Israel’s security needs at the same level it does now. Israel need not spend a moment’s time justifying the foreign aid it gets. Congress on both sides of the political aisle is very pro Israel. Much more so than the current administration.

Not that the President is anti Israel. He is not. But he has certainly not been acting like a good friend. The recently caught off the record conversation between French President Sarkozy and the President demonstrates at the very least great antipathy toward Israel’s Prime Minister. Sarkozy calling Netanyahu a liar and the President not objecting - even adding his own negative comment in response - is no way to talk about the leader of your strongest ally in the Middle East. Like I said this does not mean he is anti Israel. But it certainly does not show any warmth towards her either.

Nonetheless even under an Obama administration foreign aid would probably continue at present levels. And under a Republican administration it wouldn’t surprise me if foreign aid would even increase. With the exception of that buffoon, Ron Paul - whose candidacy is a joke - every single candidate has expressed support for Israel in far warmer and stronger tones than the current administration. They have all been highly critical of the President and have accused him of letting our closest ally Israel down.

Based on that I see nothing to worry about in a zeroed out foreign aid policy. The benefit of zeroing out is that many of the other countries that now receive aid will have to explain why they continue to deserve receiving it. It will not be so simple for many of them. Some foreign countries now receiving aid are mortal enemies of the Jewish State and given the opportunity would wipe it off the face of the earth.

With the ‘Arab Spring’ in full bloom there is no telling where the chips may fall with respect to their approach to Israel. Egypt has been getting millions in foreign aid. And even though they have promised to maintain their peace treaty with Israel the future is far from certain. Witness the attack on the Israeli embassy in Egypt not long ago. Even though the current power base there disapproved of that attack and helped the Israeli diplomats leave the country - it is indicative of where the popular sentiment really lies.

Democracy in the Middle East does not mean that relations with Israel will improve. It was democracy that brought Hamas into power. Although it is possible in theory that relations between Israel and her neighbors could improve because of new realities on the ground, it is just as likely that they will deteriorate.

The hatred of Israel is in the lifeblood of the vast majority of Arab Musilms. That’s because of their culture of a virulently anti Israel and anti Jewish attitude. One which is taught in their homes, their schools, and their universities; one that is promoted in their mosques; and one that is promoted in their news and entertainment media. I firmly believe that the anti Israel rhetoric is alive and well in the new Arab spring.

I don’t think Egypt or any other Middle Eastern country that would show the slightest inclination to destroy the Jewish state will have such an easy time justifying foreign aid under current economic and political conditions. Especially in a pro Israel congress and a no-nonsense Republican administration that has no patience for the pandering policies of the current administration.

So I say, ‘Bring it on!’ Let us have a zero based foreign aid policy. It will be good for the country, good for Israel and really bad for the enemies of both!

As for the Democrats who are trying to paint this as some sort of abandonment of Israel… here is my message to them:

Please! Your pandering to the Jewish people for political advantage is so transparent that even a blind person can see right through you. It really makes you look bad. So stop trying to appeal to the emotions and fears of the Jewish people and their supporters (which include the majority of the American people.) It does not become you.

An Abominable Event

I have not been reticent to express my views on the plight of Orthodox Jewish homosexuals and have said so many times on this blog. To repeat – same sex attraction is not sinful. It is acting upon it in ways the Torah forbids that is. This means that homosexuals have no Halachic outlet for satisfying their sex drives. That is heart rendering.

I cannot imagine what it means for someone with a healthy libido to be forced to live a celibate life! I therefore feel it is disgusting to condemn people with same sex attractions. I believe it violates in the extreme the concept of loving thy neighbor. It is a vile and cruel way to treat a fellow human being. I do not condone the unfortunate reality about the way homosexuals are treated by far too many Orthodox Jews.

To paraphrase Dr. Martin Luther King the bottom line is this. Human beings should be judged by the content of their character and not by their sexual orientation. We need to treat all of our fellow Jews with dignity and respect - as equals among us. Even if we might suspect that they are living a life of sin.

In other words love the sinner hate the sin. It is not something we can do anything about – any more than we can do anything about a fellow Jew who violates other Halachos. Haranguing them is counterproductive and has the possibility of turning them off completely from Orthodox Judaism. As long as they do not promote or flaunt a homosexual lifestyle the proper approach is to be accepting of them as fellow human beings, fellow Jews, and equals.

Which leads me to one of the more disgusting events I have ever been made aware of. It is described in an article in +972. Steve Greenberg - a rabbi with an Orthodox ordination who happens to be a homosexual - has done an abominable thing. He has performed a marriage ceremony for 2 homosexual men, complete with Kesubah, Chupah, Kiddushin and Erusin.

This goes far beyond understanding their plight. It purports to place an Orthodox imprimatur on a marriage between 2 men… in effect trying to sanctify it!

I can understand why many homosexuals push for that kind of acceptance. They want the ‘full monty’. Not just understanding, not just acceptance, not just being treated with dignity and as equals among men. But religious sanctification!

I get it. They fall in love just like heterosexuals and want the same things they do. Why should they be denied those rights? Why must they always be considered second class citizens at best even in an enlightened environment? They must have felt that an Orthodox rabbi performing a full religious ceremony gives them a fuller measure of acceptance.

The problem is that it has not really done that. Not even close. It has probably done the opposite. The very idea of placing a religious imprimatur on a marriage between 2 men flies in the face of every conceivable interpretation of what marriage means in Judaism. Rabbi Greenberg has in effect bastardized the ceremony with his changes in the language of the Kesubah and the Kidushin - and with his participation as the officiating rabbi.

I realize he has his own interpretation of the nature of the homosexual relationship. I believe his interpretation is that the Torah meant something else when it says that a man lying with another man in the manner of a woman is a capital offense. At best that is the height of rationalization. It is in effect an outcome based interpretation. He has publicly admitted that no one in Orthodoxy of any stature agrees with it. If I am not mistaken - not even those on the far left!

I realize that life for two people who love each other want to be accepted as full partners in the human endeavor. But to take this kind of step takes their desire far beyond social acceptance. It tries to give it Halachic acceptance -by using religious trappings and modalities of one of the holiest ceremonies in all of Judaism. This is unacceptable by any standard and in my view an abomination!

Consenting adults is not the Jewish standard. Not any more than it would be the Jewish standard an incestuous relationship.

And yet Rabbi Greenberg by his actions is saying that it is not only a Jewish standard but that it is holy!

This event does not help his cause in my view. It hurts it. We cannot change a Halacha just to suit us no matter how difficult that Halacha makes life. Following Halacha is sometimes very hard. We ought to acknowledge that and work to honor our commitment to it. As I often say Judaism is basically about obligations. Not rights. The Torah says no. We cannot say yes because we feel like it - and then rationalize clear Issur into Heter.

The right approach in my view is the one I have followed. It is not to legitimize the illegitimate. No matter how much it might bother us we cannot change the word of God. But at the same time we must accept the fact that some Halachos are extremely difficult to follow for some people. And that some are more difficult for one person than they are for another. No two people are alike. But the level of difficulty does not absolve us of our obligation to follow them. As long as a homosexual knows that and does not try and upend it, he ought to be treated as an equal among men and among women.

One cannot sanctify the unsanctifiable. It can never be condoned when tried.

I feel sorry for the two men who underwent this abominable procedure. I can’t blame them for seeking religious sanction for their lifestyle. They can’t help how they feel and it is no sin to try and find religious meaning in what they see as normal for themselves. But I do not feel sorry for Rabbi Greenberg. He should know better. He should have just said no. Even if he sees things differently he has to know that what he did will be universally condemned in Orthodoxy. And rightfully so.

Memo to ArtScroll

There has been much criticism over the years about the way ArtScroll treats the biographies of great men. ArtScroll founder and general editor, Rabbi Nosson Scherman, was once asked why those biographies did not include the full complement of information about those individuals.

He answered that he did not feel any obligation to historic accuracy when such information was negative (as defined by Charedi Hashkafos). There was no purpose to it other than to diminish their greatness in the eyes of the reader. The purpose of the ArtScroll biographies was to inspire the reader. Not to be a historical document.

Using this as a guide - of what value, therefore would it be to report that a Gadol like Rav Aharon Kotler read classic Russian literature as a young man or that he wrote letters to his Kalla while a student in the Yeshiva? It would be to the detriment of the goals of this great rabbinic figure to mention it as that would imply that it is OK for his Talmidim to do the same kinds of things. Things which are considered a complete waste of time at best - and Assur at worst. So they leave out information like that.

One need not have even asked Rabbi Scherman this question. His answer is obvious from Rav Elyashiv’s ban of Rav Nosson Kametsky’s book, ‘Making of a Gadol’ that told stories like this about great rabbinic figures. Rav Nosson’s book humanized his subjects by reporting the truth about them. He treated them as human beings rather than as ‘ministering angels’. He thus enhanced their greatness and made them even more inspirational.

But this kind of truth does not fly in Charedi circles. Hence the ban and Rav Scherman’s attitude.

I’m sure that before too long we will have a biography written about Rav Nosson Zvi Finkel. In my recent eulogy for this great man, I wrote about a truth that I wasn’t sure would ever be written by an ArtScroll type publication. They would either leave out – or at best give short shrift to his normal yet Orthodox American life through high school.

They may say something like, ‘He had humble beginnings growing up in Chicago’ and then go right into his achievements as the Rosh HaYeshiva of the Mir. But in article after article I have been reading about him over the past few days, the truth has been told. It is all over the internet – including that picture from the Academy yearbook.

It is a truth he did not hide from. It was a truth he was happy to share with others. A truth that flies in the face of conventional Charedi wisdom on the subject. There are numerous anecdotes about this man that completely humanizes him – anecdotes that occurred well after his becoming the Rosh HaYeshiva of Mir - perhaps the largest Yeshiva in the world. The following story was published in the Ida Crown Jewish Academy (ICJA) weekly news bulletin. The inspiration speaks for itself.

Rabbi Steven Burg, managing director of the OU, wrote in a recent newsletter another incident, which demonstrates how he was always connected to his roots in Chicago. A number of years ago, Rav Finkel addressed the NCSY Summer Kollel, asking, "Who here is from Chicago?" A number of participants raised their hands. The Rav then asked, "Who goes to Ida Crown?" Again, a show of hands. Finally, the gadol asked, "Who's on the basketball team?" As would be expected, a few hands shot up. Rav Finkel then surprised the room with his response, "So was I."

When a Gadol’s biography is sanitized, an anecdote like this will never see the light of day. And the kind of inspiration illustrated by the following would never happen.

Speaking to the students upon the Rav's death, (ICJA principal) Rabbi Matanky said, "Rav Finkel was always proud of his Chicago connection and gave special attention to our alumni whenever he ran into them. Further, knowing what he attained is an inspirational opportunity for us to rise to his illustrious example. It is a loss to all of klal yisrael."

Students were profoundly inspired by what they learned this week about Rav Finkel zt"l. Freshman Adam Gornstein said, "It is amazing to have had such an amazing person graduate from our school!"

Anna Shkolnikov said with tears in her eyes, " He was such a great rav and its a loss to the Jewish people. The death of a Tzadik means we should strive to improve ourselves." Eitan Redlich said, "I am aware of the great loss to klal yisroel, and Rabbi Nosson Tzvi Finkel will be a model for me to learn Torah."

Why wouldn’t ArtScroll want to publish this story? It takes place in an organization that invites high school kids to mixed functions many times during the year. This is anathema to Charedim. A Charedi Gadol – especially an Israeli one – would never attend a social group like that.

Nor would they consider it flattering that this Gadol once played basketball – let alone that he played competitively in a high school league with non Jewish teams. If I am not mistaken Israeli rabbinic leaders have banned their students from playing any soccer at all… or at least they strongly frown upon it. Substitute basketball for soccer and imagine telling them that one of the Gedolei HaDor not only did that in a coed high school, but bragged about it to a group of modern Orthodox kids!

Here is my memo to ArtScroll. Please do not hide these truths from your reading public. Rav Nosson Zvi didn’t and neither should you. It would be a major injustice to his memory if his biography is whitewashed. It will just be another hagiography in a long list of ArtScroll hagiographies that tells of yet another Gadol who was born holy from the womb. Leaving out information like the above anecdote is nothing less than lying about him!

One may ask, why would I care what ArtScroll does? Let others who do care about the truth of history write their own biography of this great man. Yes, that could - and may actually happen. But it is important that the readership ArtScroll know the truth as well. Many if not most of them do not generally read books that do not have the approval of their Gedolim. It is important for them to know how one of the biggest Roshei Yeshiva in the Charedi world acted, and that he did not denigrate his background. In fact he was quite ready to share it with others. So should ArtScroll.